Thursday, November 06, 2008

The Morning After

Barricading myself in the bathroom this afternoon in order to eat a Reese's Peanut Butter Cup in peace (while my 3-year-old whined and cried outside the door) was not, I will admit, my finest mothering hour. I would have felt bad about my nurturing deficiencies, but then my friend (of the Fridge of Shame fame) admitted to me that her son couldn't come play with David today because he had no clean clothes left to wear.

I love my friend.

It's just a post-Election, post-Halloween, post-Houseguest breakdown, really. My sister-in-law left early this morning and I woke up to a house strewn with used craft items and leftover candy. I also woke up to the realization that all the fun campaign news is over. It seems that reading about Obama's transition team isn't nearly as entertaining as hearing the fun stories from the campaign trail. However, my day was a bit redeemed when I found the following news report on all those Obama volunteers:


Obama Win Causes Obsessive Supporters To Realize How Empty Their Lives Are


This nasty chest cold that I've picked up isn't helping my malaise much. The funny thing is, I feel fine - except for the shortness of breath and the hacking, phlegm-y cough. But I was probably breathing too much anyway. Can oxygen make me fat?

No? I guess it was the Peanut Butter Cup, then. Imagine that.

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23 comments:

  1. I always hate the cliche of the moms rummaging through their kids candy supply and I hate it the most when I'm scarfing down my kids halloween candy. I am so weak and predictable.

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  2. Change the pillow cases daily till you feel better. Germs are like Bay-Bay kids, they don't die-they multiply (and mutate). Doing that one trick gives your immune system a chance to catch up to what's already there.

    And yes, oxygen is overrated. Just look at how full Darwin's waiting room has become.

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  3. I eat it in front of my kids and we have no clean clothes to wear either.
    How did I get to this state of being?
    I need a candy intervention.
    Or maybe a good mothering class.

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  4. Actually, working hard to breathe burns more calories than breathing easily.

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  5. I've just realized my life is actually manageable if I'm not watching 8 hours of CNN and MSNBC a day.

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  6. I am an Obama volunteer, but so happy the election is OVER and I can move on with my life. I saw this Onion video and laughed my butt off though.

    I too, am a terrible candy thief, I cannot have it in my home-EVER. My 12-year-old hides it from me.

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  7. We bought two five pound bags of Halloween candy and only gave out one.
    I am at this very moment, dangerously close to opening the other bag instead of returning it to Costco like I had planned.
    I always hide to eat my candy.
    I would have sent my kid over to your house with dirty clothes. It's amazing how you can make a stain on a shirt less noticeable by turning it inside out or backwards.
    I'm not past spraying my kid with Febreeze either.

    That video reminds me of some girls I know that put so much time and energy into their dream weddings that they went into depression after they got married because then they didn't have anything to do.

    As for oxygen? Totally overrated. I went to the dentist yesterday and he had me breathe some nitrous oxide. Much better than oxygen.

    Peanut butter cups only make you fat if someone sees you eating them.

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  8. Your posts give me comfort. There are other mothers like me in the world.

    I'm finding the Kit Kats particularly yummy bathroom eating this year.

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  9. about everyday at 3pm i find a quiet place in the house (hiding from sassnfrass) and i indulge in some sort of chocolate. reeses are my fav, but halloween always makes me love the butterfinger....of course the only thing left is mnm's now.

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  10. Immune systems need Reese's PB Cups to keep up their defenses. And I always take the full day off following the departure of houseguests. Today should officially be considered pajama day. Enjoy!

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  11. ONE Reese cup??? you can eat just ONE?

    i did well this year, kind of. i didn't raid my kids' halloween candy; i waited until sunday and bought my own at 50% off. a bag of reese's cups, and a bag of halloween colored m&m's (i didn't realize halloween had its own colors, but apparently they're purple and green and orange--are those the colors of evil???). they're gone now. both bags. oink oink.

    oh, and i've been known to make my son wear dirty socks for lack of clean ones. i probably shouldn't have shared that.

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  12. No, it's totally the oxygen that adds calories.

    At least, that is my story and I'm sticking to it.

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  13. at least you didn't eat it in front of him. your were being kind imo.

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  14. One of the few things I'm actually keeping up on right now is the laundry. Don't ask me how. I wouldn't want to eat chocolate in my bathroom, though. It's filthy.

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  15. That is too funny--like the Onion headline "Black Man given Worst Job in the World."
    Thank God for chocolate candy to help with the aftermath.

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  16. Ok, we heard about the kids. Where's the update on mice and vomit? You promised!

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  17. I hate the post-excitement letdown, too. Maybe you can obsess over cold weather preparation or Thanksgiving? I find that just the prospect of guilt-free gravy eating perks me up.

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  18. Peanut butter cup? Where?

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  19. I just had a peanut butter crunch bar YUMMMMMMYYY!

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  20. I didn't take any of the kids candy. The older ones, however, we dumb enough to leave their candy where the little kids could get it easily.

    My co-worker, on the other hand, locked his candy up in his file cabinet before he went home for the weekend. Just because he wanted some left for him on Monday?

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  21. Hee hee! I don't steal their candy, I have my own stash. I love your friend too. I gotta admit, I'm a little disappointed that SNL won't have much to spoof anymore...how empty that feels. Guess I'll go eat a Reeses and get back to the laundry.

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  22. yah right, Obama had just won as the president of USA. "Time to Change" as he says. But good to hear the campaign is now over.

    And time to relax

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  23. yah right, Obama had just won as the president of USA. "Time to Change" as he says. But good to hear the campaign is now over.

    And time to relax

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