Friday, August 27, 2010

Here's Your Clue

How To Know That Your Housekeeping Isn't Quite Up To Snuff

  • Your kids ask, "Is someone coming?" when you tell them to clean up the living room.
  • After you spend the better part of a morning vigorously scrubbing your wooden kitchen table, your 8-year-old exclaims, "I didn't know it was that color!"
  • You don't let the children open the refrigerator when company is over, for fear of public shaming.
  • Your teenager assumes someone has vomited when he sees you removing the sofa slipcover for a shaking-out.
  • You use a throw rug, strategically placed in front of the fridge, to break the fall of the jars and bottles that inevitably tumble out.
Feel free to add your own, dear readers...

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20 comments:

  1. "An iron? What's that?" asked my 6 yo.

    ReplyDelete
  2. This happened to me this week:

    You lift the sofa cushions to find missing eyeglasses and discover gobs and gobs of FOOD, some of which has been there for months.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You toss all the dirty clothes in the tub and pull the shower curtain closed when your mother in law says she's stopping by.

    Oh, and when you move the bookcases to paint the walls and discover old candy bars you had thrown on top to have, "just in case".

    ReplyDelete
  4. My house is spotless.

    There isn't a spot that's clean.

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  5. Speaking of couch cusions, my oldest will stuff candy and snack wrappers down between the cushions to avoid getting up and walking to the trash.

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  6. When you realize that the floors haven't been thoroughly swept since the 19yo left for college... because he's the only one who has cared enough to sweep them on a regular basis.

    When you take a picture of the tower of clothes baskets (full of clean clothes) about to fall over on top of the pile of dirty clothes on the floor... and then realize you can't possibly post it on the internet because it is too shameful.

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  7. Heh. I'm still laughing at the "Who is coming over" comment because I get that one every.time.I.clean.
    Apparently, the whole clean house gene did not get passed on from my mother to any of her daughters!

    ReplyDelete
  8. You reject plate after plate because they're all dirty (post dishwasher) and dinner has a healthy dose of dog hair in it.

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  9. I have *so* heard that "is someone coming over?" comment and (mostly) squelched a snappish response. Just trying to tell myself as I chip oatmeal off the tablecloth that there will come a day when I miss the pitter patter ... of Polly Pockets hitting the floor.

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  10. We suffer from CHAOS, can't have anyone over syndrome. We still have stuff on the front porch from the last trip to MIL's house and have 1 more trip left to pick up the rest of the stuff. And I thought hubby was a packrat. :) I can honestly say we should not have to buy any Christmas ornaments or lights for several years...

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  11. You live alone and wash dihes instead of unloading the dishwasher. The kitchen floor needs to be scrubbed and has needed it for more then a couple weeks but you just don't really care,'cause it's only me. You feel a sense of pride every time you fold all the laundry and find the laundry room floor, it's the same as all the other floors-who knew?
    I will go clean now.
    Thanks for the reminder that I am not the only one. It won't take long to make a difference around here!

    ReplyDelete
  12. You can write on all the surfaces of your home because you haven't dusted since you moved in.

    You want to cry every time you think of finding matching socks for your kids and head to Target instead.

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  13. Your grad student daughter tells you you dance the shuffle really really well. Here! Quick! Shuffle this out of sight, clean there later!

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  14. You have to use an ice scraper to get the dried on, caked on crud off of the kitchen counter.

    One of many behind my belt. My growing up years were traumatically filthy.

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  15. Oh my, yes. I tell people who come over that "we live here" and do my best to console myself with the fact that we have a home not a museum. [smile]

    ~Luke

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  16. Am doubled over laughing about the last one--I've done that!

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  17. Rather than clean the bathtub by hand you pour half a bottle of beach in it and sit amazed as it
    A. Turns everything white again and
    B. makes you realize how really lazy you are

    ReplyDelete
  18. Gee thanks for reminding me.

    ReplyDelete
  19. Cleaning? We're supposed to do that?

    ReplyDelete
  20. Weeds growing in the dining room. Makes me realize floors should occasionally be washed every time.

    ReplyDelete

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