Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Stinkbugs Ate My Post Title

Yo!  Mahaffey!  You're starting to upset me.  My words may not be brilliant, but they are mine; and I don't need to worry that someone is stealing them and claiming them as their own.  Either comment or email me (email available on my Blogger profile page) to let me know that, far from being a plagiarist, you are just goofing off at work.  I promise, I won't tell your boss.

And, oh Internet-savvy readers, can anyone explain to me how to check the web to see if my posts are being taken?

And this?  Is an idea whose time has come.  In a century filled with the threat of biochemical warfare, nuclear plant meltdowns, and plain old high pollen counts,  it is essential that we women sport a brassiere that not only lifts and separates, but also functions as a filtering mask when air quality dips below an acceptable level.  The developer of this engineering marvel hopes, she says, that we can all "get a feel of the product."

courtesy Cornell News
I think that I shall never hug
A creature loathsome as you, Stinkbug;
Be it night or be it day,
You thrive on being in the way.
Underfoot or in my bed,
Buzzing madly 'round my head...
I beg you, please, have mercy fair
And buzz 'round people over there.


Thank you.


  1. The one true sign that God loves us? Stinkbugs don't bite. Right?

  2. Wrong. If you catch one, it squirts its disgusting little juice on you; and you go around for the next 5 days imagining that your hands still smell like stinkbug. I'd rather be bitten. I think.

  3. You need to submit the bra mask to the blog Homemade Hilarity. I'm not advertising for them or anything, but I instantly thought of the word "crapft" when I saw it... which lead to the blog. :)

  4. We haven't had many stinkbugs this year. We are like an hour west of you, so the climate change isn't that great between our houses. We have roaches, instead. Wanna trade?

  5. Move here. We don't have them. We don't have lightning bugs either, though. We do have rattlesnakes up in the foothills and mountain lions. But no stink bugs. Seems a decent tradeoff to me.

  6. But what does a stinkbug smell like?

  7. When you find out let me know, 'cause I'm sure someone must be stealing from me!

    'Cause, you know. . . I'm so, plagirizable. . .

  8. When we were having a nice breezy fall day, we couldn't find the stinkbugs anywhere. WEIRD.
    And yesterday, during a doozie of a thunderstorm (with MARBLE sized hail!), I discovered they were all hanging out on the porch ceiling.

    Have I mentioned I hate stinkbugs?

  9. Try or - you can also just take a few sentences from a popular post and put them in Google and see what pops up.

  10. Good stinkbug poem. Now, off to harass mahaffey.

  11. That is one UGLY bug.
    I'd wear that mask simply to conceal how my chin is sagging and my lower cheeks are getting jowly with age and gravity conspiring against me!