Today was Susie's 1st Communion. Today was ALSO Youth Fun Day at our credit union, complete with balloon animals, a bounce house, and - most important of all - the money vault, a cage-like blow-up contraption that has air blown into it which makes a bunch of fake money fly around. Each child gets a turn to grab at flying pieces of paper, and he/she wins whatever amount he/she is clutching in his/her greedy little hands at the end of 15 seconds.
Naturally, Susie was upset at the prospect of her 1st Communion taking away her chance in the money-grabbing contraption. So I agreed to take her to the credit union at 9 AM sharp, where she would be able to indulge in money-grabbing fun before having to head to church to receive an important sacrament. Because that's my job, teaching my kids priorities.
Come on, people - there was a MONEY VAULT.
So Susie "earned" 6 dollars in the money vault, and I entered all sorts of drawings for real cash prizes. AND there was free food and other giveaways. I call that a win-win, don't you?
Susie and I returned home with our swag in time for her to get dressed, and then our family headed to the church, where the boys and girls looked killer-cute in their blue blazers and white dresses. And all would have gone smoothly had our church possessed real wooden pews, instead of metal chairs. As it was, while the girls sat primly still, intent on keeping their veils and assorted other white hairpieces in place on their heads, those poor CCD teachers had their hands full, trying to silence the squirming mass of 7-year-old boys beating a random and noisy tattoo upon the chairs in front of them with their brass sleeve buttons.
You know, I bet they wouldn't have been so restless had they expended some of that energy in the money vault first.