Now, admittedly I have gotten a bit lax on the childproofing as my youngest approaches the august age of 3; so there might be a small chance that maybe I left a tube of Vick's VapoRub in her dresser. And it is just possible that, in her desire to be just like Mommy (isn't she smart?), Susie may have decided - upon discovering what looked like Mommy's hand cream in her sock drawer - that her sweet little baby hands were in urgent need of some moisturizing therapy. And acted accordingly.
All of which may explain why Larry came home from church today complaining that everyone within 3 rows of our little mentholatum bomblet was blowing his/her nose constantly during the Mass. Maybe.
But I say there is just something going around.
Have I mentioned Susie's fat little legs lately? Her round little bottom? Her big brown eyes that stand out even though they have to compete with her extremely big, round cheeks? We squeeze her all the time and threaten to eat her up. Yum.
Round is so cute. Maybe it will be the new black...
And, boy, could I identify with Opus's anxiety closet today. I mean, the librarian part - not the Clinton part - of course.
At three, I thought I was past having to childproof for him, beyond the obvious stuff like outlet plugs and hiding the knives.
ReplyDeleteThen in the past 2 weeks, he has sprayed hairspray in his mouth, taken a swig of a bottle of peroxide I accidentally left out, squeezed my lip balm all over the floor, and licked a butter knife.
So much for being past the childproofing...
I don't know; I think the librarian *and* the senator are just about equally scary. But not as scary as those dreams I have every two or three years, that I am still married to the children's father and responsible for cleaning up his messes, financial and otherwise. That's not an anxiety closet; that's a connecting suite with valet service [mine].
ReplyDeleteThat's too funny. I've never really "babyproofed" my house with any of the kids, but now that my baby is 4 I'm finding I need to do it NOW! She puts everything in her mouth! It's driving me crazy. ;)
ReplyDeleteI feel like I am so much more lax with kid #2... I can only imagine how laid back you must be at #6.
ReplyDeleteI totally thought of you when I read Opus today.
ReplyDeleteA little anti-histimine action is good for everyone here and there.
ReplyDeleteKEEP BELIEVING
I don't know why, but I love the smell of Vicks. I even buy the facial tissues with the Vicks in them - great when you have a cold. I would have loved to sit near Susie. And she sounds like she was good for the sinuses.
ReplyDeleteLet's all pray that round is indeed the new black, 'cause svelte I ain't!
ReplyDeleteRound being the new black - now THAT would be progress!
ReplyDeleteHeidi
motherwise - I do, too. But my husband hates it. I also like the smell of bandaids and of mothballs. He thinks I am weird.
ReplyDeletejenn - Thanks, it's good to know that I am now famous (or, rather, infamous) for my library delinquency.
mommyk - Peroxide? Really? And he's still alive?
I'm still childproofing for by teen - you know, locking the liqour cabinet and all. But the Vicks story is classic!
ReplyDeleteI am TERRIFIED of our local librarians. THey are grouchy.
ReplyDeleteBy three, we get pretty relaxed about childproofing, too.
beck - Ours aren't grouchy - but some of them are sort of fascist, in that I think they believe a police state would be a good idea, insomuch as then people would be forced to return their library books...
ReplyDeleteI love the smell of bandaids, too. I was definitely more lax with the 2nd one.
ReplyDeleteSusie sounds truly scrumptious.
Oh, I love the smell of Vicks! I WISH the smell choices at our church were even half that good. I always seem to end up behind the poopy diapers or the farty old men.
ReplyDeleteThat sounds like the time when my eldest smeared A&D ointment all over her sister, the floor, the crib and the mirror. But at least it didn't smell. :)
ReplyDeleteOnce Scarlett got Tiger Balm, a similar devil. She thought it was some kind of butt creme. I can still smell it. . . .
ReplyDeleteMy bedside table is literally an inch deep in baby powder thanks to my 3 year old. We just do not open the drawer anymore! problem solved?
ReplyDeleteLOL! Monkey managed to steal grandma's lipstick and EAT part of her favorite Chanel color just this week. Nothing is safe for a 2 year old.
ReplyDelete