Back In The Saddle

For any newbies out there, let me explain: back in 2008, I started cleaning out my refrigerator and posting the contents on this blog for the sole purpose of making everyone else in the world feel better about their own housekeeping abilities.  I consider it to be a sort of community service.  I am, if you will, the Melinda Gates of refrigerator philanthropy.

Well, I've been slacking off for a while, but today I did it - I cleaned out my fridge.  And I have the photos to prove it:

Above are the primary culprits.  From the left!

1. Broccoli - These forgotten veggies are the innocent victims of my February vow to eat something green every day. They bear silent witness to the futility of all human aspirations.

2. A completely empty pickle jar - this is in keeping with what is apparently my children's motto: Why recycle something when you can just shove it back into the refrigerator instead? Or their other motto: Mom will do it.  Leave it for her.

3. A jar of Kirkland-brand salsa old enough to have white fuzzy stuff growing on it - I swore off this salsa the first time we tried it, ages ago.  So I have no idea what it is doing in there. DON'T BUY IT - it's awful.

4. Worcestershire sauce with an expiration date of 2013 on the label - and I wonder why no one accepts my dinner invitations...

5. A jar of tahini that ALSO expired in 2013.  You know, I had high hopes for this particular food item - I distinctly remember planning to make all my own hummus because I had an ever ready supply of tahini in my fridge.  This scenario never came to pass. Where DOES a dream go when it dies? Into my refrigerator, apparently.

6. Far right, bottom, is unidentified - it might be some sort of salad dressing.  Or someone's science experiment. Or both. Atop that is horseradish with NO expiration date, so I am not going to risk it. Safety first!

7. Front and center, a container of excellent deli mustard imported all the way from NJ, after my father's unveiling.  That's right, that would have been last October. And, as those of you aware of my condiment problems already know, there are several other jars of mustard still in the fridge.

8. On top of the mustard is what seems to be some moldy hot peppers, provenance unknown.  Gross.

So, I removed all of the above, and the refrigerator was STILL overcrowded.  I investigated further and found the following:

Really, kids?

See? This is what my family does.  It puts teeny tiny bits of leftovers (pancakes, top, and meatloaf, bottom) in the largest containers possible, out of sheer laziness or maybe just to mess with my mind. I rectified the situation thusly:

Now, was that so hard?

Sometimes it takes an expert, you know?

So now my fridge looks a little more manageable, but I didn't even attempt to clean out the 2 drawers at the bottom (a quick glance revealed a few apples, bought in early December, and some grapefruit I bought from the high school band member next door back in November) or the dreaded cheese/deli meat drawer.  There is only so much humiliation I can take in one post.

Feel better now? You're welcome.