Safety Tips! Health Advice! All Free!

The way I feel about this particular piece of news is this: anyone dumb enough to put a bear on ice skates deserves what happens to him. The article states that it is not clear what caused the bear to attack the manager during rehearsal. Not clear? Really? Are bears natural ice-skating enthusiasts? I think not.

All of which leads us to our important safety tip for the day: don't piss off a bear.

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And then there is this finding:

Deadly brain abscesses should be added to the list of risks of having a tongue piercing, say doctors. Piercing can more commonly lead to chipped teeth and oral infections, and sometimes heart problems, say experts.

Not to mention totally grossing people out...I mean, what is up with that, anyway? Still, the article goes on to tell us that

Despite the risks, tongue piercings remain popular.

Which makes me think that those brain abscesses were actually a pre-existing condition...

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And, finally, an important reminder from last flu season - now is not the time to be thinking about diets! Praise the Lord and pass the Trefoils...

Whine and KitKats

Way fewer visitors today - must be that not everyone is as enamored with an indoor electric compost maker as I am. Who woulda thunk it?

Oh, well, I still want one. At cost. Are you listening, NatureMill? Don't you want to prove AlisonH wrong? She's saying that there is no way your patented charcoal filter renders the compost operation odor-free. And she's threatening to send me her colostomy bag (with filter) to prove it.

I must say, that was the strangest comment I have ever received on this blog. Much as I appreciate AlisonH's generosity, I am not taking her up on her offer.

Nothing new to talk about today, I'm afraid - I've got David quarantined in the guest bedroom until the flu incubation period is over; Anna is currently suffering from virus #372 this season and demanding relief (while refusing all offers of VapoRub, cough drops, Sudafed, and hot tea); I'm rather under-the-weather myself; and Larry and I haven't had more than 2 minutes worth of conversation at any one time in the past 4 days.

Also, the house is a mess.

See? Same old, same old...I guess this was just another Whine Night. Maybe it's time to break into the bags of Halloween candy for a little pick-me-up. Nothing like a sack of KitKats to make my day...

[Feel free to add your own whine in the comments. No colostomy bags, though...]

Love And Compost

Look at this beauty! I've been haunting the NatureMill website and ogling it for an hour. 50 cents a month to operate! Designer colors! Earth-friendly!

What do you mean, what is it? It's what every woman secretly desires (well, every woman with a fridge filled with rotting produce, anyway) - an electric composter that fits in her kitchen! Combine this brilliant invention with my fridge cleanout posts, and my humble spot on the Internet might become the blogging equivalent of a Prius - earth-friendly, avant-garde, and annoyingly pretentious. I can see it now - "Even with 6 kids, our family produces less landfill waste than the most righteous ZPG'er!"



Check out the website and take particular note of the top left of the homepage - it boasts a picture of a chic-looking couple gazing adoringly at one another whilst the guy scrapes his dinner plate into the composter.
That would be me and Larry if we happened
to own this fine appliance...


Well, if we happened to own this fine appliance and we dressed up all the time...

And I lost 20 pounds...

And, um, we weren't too tired to smile at each other in the evening...

Never mind.

Not The Best Idea

So! As anticipated, I enjoyed a pleasantly toasty weekend indoors while Larry and David trudged around with a bunch of Boy Scouts in the rain (and snow!). But gloating that this particular camping trip would not affect me adversely? Not a good idea. As I remembered when I checked my voicemail this evening, the Fates do not like to be taunted in that manner:

"Hi! This is Sam's dad - since David shared a tent with Sam last night, we thought you should know..."

(Maybe I should hang up? If I don't hear it, it won't be happening, right?)


"...that Sam appears to have the flu."

(Darn! I knew it! Oh, well, those are the breaks...)

"It's probably H1N1, as the rest of our family had it last week."

(Okay, now I'm pissed off.)

Hardship Duty

It's raining.

It's cold.

And Larry and David are off backpacking in the woods with the Boy Scouts. Have I mentioned that I'm glad I'm a girl?

I'll just hang out here with the little ones and keep the home fires burning. Maybe we'll make some hot cocoa, to ward off the chill. Parcheesi, anyone?

It's a tough job, but someone's got to do it...