I searched all the shelves in Target today, looking for mini packages of Hot Tamales to hand out next week. I couldn't find any. I found Smarties, I found Twizzlers, I found Mike and Ikes - but no Hot Tamales. I would have asked for help, but I felt like an idiot, complaining about some missing candy whilst surrounded by approximately 15 billion bags of the same.
So the question remains - WHERE ARE THE HOT TAMALES? I crave their chewy cinnamon goodness, with an urgency unmatched even by my love of fun-size Snickers. Don't judge - I'm nothing but an overworked suburban mom seeking comfort, like so many others out there this time of year.
Can I blame this on the Obama administration? Is it possible that its economic policies have caused massive shortfalls in Hot Tamales production? And why didn't this come up in last night's debate? Oh, sure, it was all Iran this and Syria that; but what about the issues that truly matter to us as Americans? What does it matter if the troops come home from Afghanistan if there are no Hot Tamales awaiting them? Apparently we, as a country, have forgotten the things that truly matter.
I guess I'll just go drown my sorrows in a Twix. But it isn't the same...
[Hot Tamales image: CandyWarehouse]
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