Saturday, March 29, 2008

Hemingway Redux

Larry went up to the attic yesterday to find his camping stuff and discovered 3 (count them! 3) full mousetraps. I thought it had been sort of quiet up there lately. As usual, he was quite proud of himself for his hunting prowess. He treated himself to an extra beer after disposing of the bodies. I'm just glad he didn't have them stuffed and hung above the fireplace.

Larry was looking for his camping gear because he and David headed off for a fun Boy Scout camping trip today, David's first. It was sort of touching how excited David was. I mean, if excited means screaming, "I'm not going! I don't want to go!" Larry practically had to carry him out to the car.

Parenting isn't for weaklings, you know.

And lest you think we are cruel for forcing our son to participate, the kid was eager to go until yesterday, when he found out that Uncle Matt was coming to stay for the weekend. David didn't want to miss a second of the visit, though most of today will consist of watching the little girls play with their uncle's cellphone (it has a camera! And fun tunes!). In fact, as of this writing, Uncle Matt is still abed (it's past noon), as he is not used to having his sleep patterns messed up by a screaming 10-year-old at 6 in the morning. No one else around here even noticed the disruption. Uncle Matt leads a very sheltered life.

I had planned to give myself a break from a solo parenting weekend by going to yoga class this morning - but instead I ended up leaving the minivan at the local auto shop for a new battery (after a kindly neighbor once more jump started it for me) and then walking back home. Oh, well - it still beat being stuck in the house on duty all day. Now I just have to figure out what to do with the kids for the rest of the day. I mean, once I stop wasting my time watching this funny video on the new trend of outsourcing childcare to India, brought to you from those strange folks at The Onion. Boy, some people can really take Idle Parenting to an extreme...

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19 comments:

  1. Oh Holy Cow...I just watched it. LMAO!!!

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  2. mary alice - I don't know what I liked more - the mother pushing the kid's hand back into the box or the picture of a woman preparing to mail off her 3-week-old at a roadside FedEx kiosk. Those packing peanuts were such a great touch, weren't they?

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  3. I find people who live sheltered lives amusing. And wish for them to have many children of their own someday.

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  4. "I'm just glad he didn't have them stuffed and hung above the fireplace."

    I never know which of your clever lines in each and every post to call my favorite. You are so clever.

    I am cracking up at the kid screaming and being carried to the car for his camping trip. That's about how things go around here some days.

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  5. Yes, the packing peanuts were brilliant...I liked the Dad talking about how much quieter their son was when he came back and they got him back out of the box - sometimes for two or three day!

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  6. Yeah, I'm going to need an address for that service.

    That was hilarious!! (Hence, the double exclamation points) Especially after the day I've had. I needed a laugh. ("I ate my own fingers..." Heh.)

    Enjoy your weekend!

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  7. is that not the funniest?! I love that clip.

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  8. Too funny! Those "parents" had serious looking faces, didn't crack a bit.

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  9. seriously. when my husband catches a mouse around here you'd think he took down a four point buck -- whatever that is

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  10. Why must you always torment your children? Making them go places they said they wanted to go? What's up with that?

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  11. Uhm...outsourcing childcare to India. What a concept. Very appealing somedays...

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  12. the vid is very funny.

    Recently stayed at our nephew's house. His children came into play in our room at 7am. I was dressed and ready for it - husband was surprised by it. Durr. What did he think was going to happen when we were the visiting entertainment?

    Sometimes I think guys are dumb on purpose. You think?

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  13. I love The Onion.

    Isn't it funny how once you become a parent things like dropping the car off at the shop and then walking home suddenly become things you want to do? I bet Uncle Matt wouldn't have found that nearly as relaxing as you did!

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  14. You didn't go to class? Guess it's a good thing we went on Friday night, then. :D Good to see you - hopefully next time it won't be like 5 months between sightings!

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  15. That Onion video was VERY funny.
    Thank God your husband just buried your dead instead of mounting them...

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  16. I think Uncle Matt needs to come over more often!

    Glad you're decimating your mice population. Hey, if you get yourself a nice healthy skunk, the mice will disappear. Um, you don't even need to keep it in the house.

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  17. Great post - too funny! I'm off to check out the video!

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  18. 3 dead mice? Ugh.

    Well, better than 3 live mice.

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  19. HAH! Loved the video!

    The kid probably loved being in those peanuts, too.

    You know, I just got a really huge box that those 24" pots come in, and I've got a bunch of packing peanuts in the garage....

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