Wednesday, June 18, 2008

The Idiot's Guide to Life

Sue requested that we regale her with tales of idiotic things we have done (as if my tale of mistaken identity weren't enough). She wants reassurance that she isn't the only one going through life half-assed and backwards. So here you go, Sue...

I went to pick up Theo at his job last night (he's a cashier at a local supermarket)(the same supermarket, in fact, where I am infamous for line-cutting); and while I was waiting for him to finish his shift, I noticed that the store had some very pretty cotton tea towels (red) drastically reduced ($1.94 for 2!). Ever the bargain hunter, I picked up 3 packs of 2 and headed for the self-scan registers. But the towels were scanning in for 2 dollars higher than advertised. Never one to be a shrinking violet, I summoned the cashier, who called a customer service rep over. I dragged this unfortunate gentleman to the other end of the store (all the while tying up the register) to show him the real price. He agreed, and then he had to fetch another customer service person to override the wrong price and enter the new one. And they even gave me one pack of tea towels free!

Now wouldn't it have been nice if, after inconveniencing no less than three (count them, three) store employees, I actually had the money to pay for my purchase? But it was at this point I discovered that I had left my credit card at home by the computer. And there were only 34 lonely cents in my purse.

So I had to ask the nice cashier if she could void the purchase. And hang onto my stuff until I could come back with my card. I considered just taking the one free pack of tea towels and calling it a night, but I thought that would be too tacky. I have to hand it to that woman - she didn't start whacking me over the head with her scanning gun. Because I know that's what I would have done if I had been in her place.

Feel better, Sue? I thought so...

24 comments:

  1. Ouch. I feel your pain.

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  2. I'm pretty sure that could only happen to you. And I don't even know you.

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  3. Sue's mood has probably lightened dramatically after reading this!

    I am blushing and feeling embarrassed for you right now!

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  4. AnonymousJune 18, 2008

    I did that at the church cafe the other day, ordered all this stuff for breakfast that they start making before I remembered I'd lost my bank card and hadn't got my new one yet.

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  5. They certainly have nice employees there...but....you can bet they talked about you after you left.

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  6. OMG that is so funny and RELATABLE if you get my drift...

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  7. I've done that sort of thing before. But the reason I didn't have my purse was because my son (2 years old at the time) has put it in our rubbish bin at home and I hadn't noticed.

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  8. Next time try faking a heart attack or something to distract them. Then run when they're busy calling 911. Seriously it sounds like an episode of King of Queens.

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  9. ALWAYS look forward to reading your posts!!! Starting the morning with a laugh is good medicine for our whole family.

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  10. Heh heh ACK, I did that last week. With a cart full of groceries and three kids in tow, I realized at the checkstand that I didn't have my debit card. It was not a good moment.

    Thanks for the link and the reassurance.

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  11. Ooh, I were there people in line behine you? If so, I bet they were ticked. You diva you.

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  12. That was a good one! I am having a hard time narrowing down my idiot moments to just sharing one.

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  13. Have definitely pulled something like that. You'll make the store's Christmas party reel, for sure.

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  14. AnonymousJune 18, 2008

    snort. ;-)

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  15. Are you sure Theo still has a job there? He may qualify for employee humiliation by mother must quit job syndrome.

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  16. Ohhhh, yeah, that's pretty bad. (and really, really funny)

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  17. Maybe next time your should go in icognito. You know, wear the funny glasses/moustache combo.

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  18. I am sooo hooked on your blog now!! My sides hurt from laughing and crying as I read your posts! I'll tell ya', I've been without a penny in my purse, just like you. So I'd tell everyone to "wait!"...as I run to my car for nickels and dimes! :D

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  19. I'm laughing over here but I shouldn't because I can totally see this happening to me. It's nice of you to try and make Sue feel better though. Oh, and in case I'm not back on Saturday...Happy Birthday!

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  20. Oh gosh. Can you imagine the look on her face if you had just grabbed the package of free ones, and said waltzed out?

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  21. AnonymousJune 19, 2008

    Something similar happened to me last year. I was in line at the cheap-o grocery store, behind a woman who was diligently trying to pay for her purchases with an ATM card while the clerk was telling her that the machine won't take ATM cards. The lady behind me and I exchanged sympathetic, yet smug glances as these two poor souls (neither of whom spoke English as a first, or even a second, language, but it was the only one common to both) tried to make each other understand. Enter the manager; problem solved. My turn next. I realize with horror, after everything is rung up, I have left my wallet with my credit cards at home. Ah, thankfully I did have my checkbook, with my ancient check cashing card, but the clerk said that would be fine. Except that not only was the address the wrong one, the name was too. It still had my maiden name. We've been married 18 years. Enter the manager again; I didn't dare look at the lady behind me.

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  22. What can I say but... yikes.

    As a not- taking- crap- from- anyone kind of person myself, I hate it when it happens to me.

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  23. I just read on the web somewhere that because of the economy, stores are doing this bait and switch thing ON PURPOSE. Apparently people don't bother to check their receipts often enough and the stores are making a killing! So way to go.

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  24. Thank you. I've been a bit overwhelmed lately...THAT made me Laugh Out Loud!
    Blessings, E

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