Saturday, September 20, 2008

Corporate Malfeasance

Hershey's Corporation, I want to have a word with you. You know, all the time those Belgium-loving dark chocolate snobs have been raving about the joys of high-priced, fancy European confections, the real Americans among us have refused to be swayed. We have continued buying your Hershey's with Almonds, your Almond Joys, your Reese's, all the while chanting, "U-S-A! U-S-A!" We trusted you, Hershey's; we knew that the chocolate company that had served our grandparents and our parents would know what was best for us, and best for our country...

And you repay our blind trust with this? Replacing the smooth creamy taste of cocoa butter with vegetable oil? How stupid do you think we are? Don't you think we realize there is a lot more at stake here than our own wallets? Do you think we want to see our children growing up and eating inferior chocolate? By then, you'll probably be outsourcing the chocolate production to China; and Lord knows what they'll be slipping into our Reese's.

Hershey's, it is becoming apparent how little respect you have for the intelligence of your constituency. Oh, you didn't believe we would notice you were cheating us, did you? You just tried to keep us busy waving our pro-American-chocolate flags while you laughed all the way to the bank.

[But, look! What's this? The bank is closed. Because - whaddaya know! - those people were hypocrites, too, talking about how the business of America is business and how trickle-down economics benefits everyone and if we just kept shopping and buying homes and acting like good little consumers, everything would be all right. All while they turned our economy into one huge Ponzi scheme...way to go, big guys!]

You know what? Some of us are getting tired of having our patriotism thrown in our faces just to blind us to unacceptable chocolate manufacturing practices. Hershey's - stop taking advantage of our brand loyalty and give us our real chocolate back. It's a matter of trust.

And remember - Halloween is coming...

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34 comments:

  1. Hershey's has been gross for many, many years. In their bars with just almonds? You can taste the wax! Friends from OZ said Hershey's still tastes like chocolate down their way whereas they gagged on ours.

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  2. Excellent post - can I say I was most alarmed to hear that they wanted to change the FDA definition of chocolate? How can chocolate not have cocoa butter? If I wanted that, I would eat white chocolate - nasty.

    Now I know why I never like the kissables. I thought it was the candy coating. Who knew something so sinister lurked beneath.

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  3. mmmhhhh.......chocolate.

    Yulck - veggie oil in chocolate......

    Mmmmhhhh.......chocolate!!!!!

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  4. Say it ain't so. . . . and then read In Defense of Food. Period.

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  5. Say it ain't so. . . . and then read In Defense of Food. Period.

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  6. No.Way.

    I am horrified. And thankful. Thankful you have brought this to my attention. It kind of reminds me of how some 'cheese' is called a 'processed cheese food product'...huh? Okay, time to go for the good stuff again--chocolate without cocoa butter?!? Seriously?

    It's gonna take me a while to process this one....

    Blessings!

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  7. Hadn't you noticed? Reecies peanut butter cups are smaller! At least one cup size smaller. From a C cup to a B cup definitely. I am heartbroken. Betrayed by my one true love.

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  8. I guess we'll just have to eat more, then.

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  9. yuck! vegetable oil in chocolate? yuck yuck yuck.

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  10. Maybe this is why I stopped craving chocolate a few years ago. It just didn't taste good; had little appeal.

    If I want a chocolate fix now, I indulge in one of those little Ghiradelli squares.

    So Hershey's lost me, after an upbringing eating Hershey's candy bars. No way I'm going back now.

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  11. Eew, just eew. I'll have to buy real baking chocolate for smores, snacks, etc.?

    At least the Ghiradelli triple chocolate chunk brownie mix from Costco still tastes good.

    Just remember, chocolate makes mama happy. And if Mama ain't happy, aint nobody gonna be happy. :)

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  12. This is just sick and wrong!

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  13. The bank is closed. Heh. Good one, SC, good one.

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  14. YUCK!
    I'm REALLY limited in what kinds of chocolate I can buy around here. Wah.

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  15. I am just so grateful that you are focused on the important issues... like chocolate. I am absolutely sure this will be discussed on Friday's debate.

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  16. I am thinking the Nestle people will be noticing the rebound. I wish I could just boycott, and not eat chocolate. But that is pure madness, madness I tell you.

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  17. Yes, let's not throw out the baby with the bath water. Cool heads must prevail.

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  18. The bank is closed. You kill me! So does Hershey's. How dare they? Is nothing sacred anymore?

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  19. Thanks for another homeschool current events lesson.

    This is just another sign of our frightening sub-standard quality times.

    KEEP BELIEVING

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  20. Argh! How dare they? Boycott, boycott!!!

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  21. Here here. I read this and the articles you linked, and my duaghter is outraged. There will be no kisses in our candy bowl this year. Pffffft!

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  22. This has just been really bothering me since I read this, for whatever reason. So few joys left in life.....

    Callie
    http://chezbichet.blogspot.com/

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  23. I guess it's a good thing i am not a huge chocolat fan...now mess my lemon meringe pie then we will have probs

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  24. I was curious. Would it be un-American to eat overseas chocolate if America has turned its back on us? Just commenting out loud!

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  25. Amen Sister! I'm switching to snobby un-American chocolate.

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  26. No wonder they were Buy One Get One Free last week at the grocery store.....

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  27. I'm crushed. Time to make homemade truffles.

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  28. you tell em!

    Seriously I loved this post and wanted to write something really cool in your comment section. but I couldn't think of anything really cool. but I loved reading it! I got all fired up and wanted to have a 10000 women peace march in hershey pa!

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  29. Whats next? Will we have to eat....FRUIT? OMG, did I type that? Have you ever thought of hiring yourself out to write those kind of letters? You know, you could make a killing writing letters for people who are afraid to speak their mind or tell someone off!

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  30. The other day I was in a 'gourmet' chocolate shop. And I spied Hersheys kisses. And I was all 'OMG! Hersheys kisses! In AUSTRALIA! WANT WANT WANT!' and I handed over my weekly grocery budget for 6 of them (cause the stinkers were selling them separately, which I am sure is illegal or something) and I came home and hid them in the laundry room, cause that is where I hide the chocolate from my chocolate nomming hormonal teenagers, and when they were at school I sat down to savour one and it was rotten.

    Tasted like dirt and vomit and old lady underpants. Well, that is what I think it tasted like, not having nommed on old lady underpants...

    So what I am trying to say in my long winded way is don't mess with the Hersheys until I have at least sampled that nectar of the USA Gods.

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