Thursday, June 18, 2009

Food, Exciting and (Not) New....

I am devastated. I wrote a witty first paragraph here and discovered, when I went to link something to a previous fridge post, that I had written almost the exact same witticisms 4 months ago.

In other words, I'm all washed up. Next thing you know, I'll be appearing on The Loveboat.

So let's just get on with it, shall we?

Readers will note that I am once again segregating glass and plastics. I don't know why. Old habits die hard, I guess.

Strike that - I've made that joke before, too.

On the left, from bottom to top:
  1. Mexican chicken with black beans - we love this meal. Everyone eats it. But it disappeared toward the back of the fridge (as I've stated before, refrigerators are built too deep) and now it is past its prime. Hasta la vista! (Did that sentence make sense? I don't speak Spanish.)
  2. Enchilala Duff - everyone used to love this. I don't know what happened.
  3. Leftover sloppy joes - see #1
  4. Leftover skillet lasagna - this one is probably a candidate for radiocarbon dating. You see, we just had skillet lasagna and this wasn't leftover from that batch. Confusing, I know. [Whoops, I made that radiocarbon dating joke before, also. I'm a has-been - a comedic has-been.] [Is "has-been" a word? It looks really weird.]
On the right, from top to bottom (just to confuse you further):
  1. Yogurt that expired June 8th - another victim of fridge depth
  2. Applesauce jar - empty - there's another almost-full one in the refrigerator....I know, I know, I'm destroying a work of art .
  3. Raisin oatmeal - I just can't help myself.

Some limp stalks of celery languish in the foreground of this picture, mostly because none of my children understand the command (given in perfectly good English), "Put the celery in the Tupperware celery keeper, dammit." (Yes, I do speak in bold font when talking to my children. Sometimes I speak in italicized bold font, also. Nothing works, though.) The celery (remember? we were talking about celery) is accompanied by a derelict bag of baby carrots (found, of course, in the back of the fridge).

Let me leave you now with the tune that is currently running through my head:



For those of you who managed to sit through that piece of 70's memorabilia, did you notice that one of the guests was McLean Stevenson? What was up with that? And have I ever mentioned how much I wanted to be Julie? So perky! And pretty! And did I mention perky? As Julie, I could have maybe snagged that cute yeoman (what was his name? Gopher?).

In case you have not yet figured it out, I possessed no semblance of a social life during my teen years. I should ask Larry to give me the DVD set for my birthday (coming up!). I could make Anna stay home some weekend and watch it with me. You know, just so's she can appreciate her relatively fun-filled teenage existence....sort of a Scared Straight for chronically petulant adolescent girls...

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14 comments:

  1. OMG that was HILARIOUS - even if part of it was recycled - you're funny AND environmentally conscientious!

    I totally love the Love Boat!! Do you read Gaston Studios? She has pics up from when she worked in Bahrain and she LOOKS like Julie.

    For the record though - I NEVER thought Doc was attractive and/or charming. Casting needed some work.

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  2. Were you cleaning the fridge for the week??? I hate having to toss expired food. I feel so wasteful.

    Love Boat and Fantasy Island!!! So tame now compared with Two and a Half Men!!!

    Dexter needs to go kill that perky Julie girl on love boat!!

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  3. Of course you wanted to be Julie . . . we all did! The perkiness, the hair, the travel, the hot cruisers--it was a dream job.

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  4. Thanks! Now I have "The LOOOOOOOVE Boat! Exciting and Neeeeewwwwww...." repeating over and over in my head. And yes, Julie was an excellently cool character.....

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  5. I cleaned out my fridge day before yesterday but haven't made it to the grocery yet to replenish it yet. I feel bad buying food. I feel like I'm consigning it to a slow painful death in the vegetable bin.

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  6. There's celery currently rotting in my fridge, and I keep shoving the bag of cranberries further to the back. They've been there since.... I can't remember. I keep putting off cleaning out my fridge.

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  7. thanks a heap for the ear worm...

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  8. Is Anna back from her Europe escapades to be able to watch the movie with you??? Cause I'm dying to know if she missed you! :)

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  9. Your fridge, my van--our lives are so paralleled.
    I thought Julie had the perfect job, and the perfect spunk for it. And I liked how the show was an equal opportunity hook-up--every one got a shot at love (exciting and new).

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  10. This was a perfect post! OK, I wanna know what's up with all the designers as guests. Bob Mackie? Halston? Gloria Vanderbilt? What episode was this?

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  11. Hasta la vista, means see you later. Technically, if you're throwing it away, you don't want to see it again, but I bet you will if your fridge is anything like mine. I have been pondering how to stop producing this kind of garbage, but I think I would need a new brain, or life, or both to pull it off.

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  12. Do not waste your money on that DVD. Rent it from the library for free. Fantasy Island is even worse.

    Better yet, read a book

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  13. I just wanted it to torture poor Anna with...

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  14. We also are often victims of "fridge deaths". Glad it's not just us.
    And you taught me something today, I had no idea there was a tupperware just for celery! Must find that one!

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