Friday, April 27, 2012

Brinkmanship, Suburban Style

I just want to let you know that we are down to our last roll of toilet paper in this house.  ONE MORE ROLL.  And I don't go to the commissary until Sunday.  I know! It's like bungee jumping, only more scary.

Oh, yeah, I could panic and go to the local grocery store and get toilet paper there.  More expensive toilet paper.  After I examine every single brand and determine the relative square footage and prices. With the aid of a calculator and maybe a slide rule or two...

Or I could just wait 2 days and go to the commissary, where I already know which toilet paper is the best buy (and where I don't seem to mind sharing that knowledge with attractive fellow customers, comparison shopping hussy that I am).

Fun fact:  A double roll?  Isn't.

I just noticed that our regular toilet paper is "100% premium recycled."  I don't really want to think about that.






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12 comments:

  1. We use wrapping paper. it's festive. Also, you've been memed.

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    Replies
    1. I'm going to check out the square footage on those dollar rolls of wrapping paper at Target. You may be on to something here.

      Delete
  2. Go to the grocery store, it'll be better in the END!

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  3. I have a complete terror of running out toilet paper. We have such a stockpile.

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  4. We buy Costco brand toilet paper, 30 rolls per pack. However, if we run out before the next Costco trip, I buy whatever is cheapest at a local store. The Costco in Pentagon City is open until 7 pm on Saturdays, so I can go after work. Otherwise, the nearest Costco, the Winchester store, is 20 miles from my house. We do live out in the boonies, don't we?

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    Replies
    1. As the mother of a large family, you must know that it isn't the number of rolls but the actual square footage that matters! For example, Marcal sells 2 different 12-roll packages for the same price with way different actual amounts of toilet paper. And they have practically identical packaging, a fact to which I can sadly attest after having bought the wrong kind one month -- a month where I ended up changing the toilet paper roll every single day.

      Caveat emptor, baby...where IS the government when we need it?

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    2. I'm terrified of running out of TP too! Is there a name for our phobia? :)

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  5. Ration it out to each family member now and pray that no one contracts Montezuma's revenge. You'll be on the edge of your (toilet) seat waiting to see just how long that last roll will last. This is the stuff that makes life exciting!

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  6. Amateurs! It is apparent that none of you lived in a Communist USSR, where toilet paper was a luxury. On the other hand, if in this internet age you don't subscribe to newspapers, I don't have many other suggestions. Ahh, memories!

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  7. We had a similar incident here last week--down to our last roll--I wondered what the pioneers did in these situations.

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  8. Stopping by here the week after the possible incident, what I want to know is did you run out of toilet paper?!?

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