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Showing posts from February, 2014

Laundry Much?

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All quiet on the vomiting front here, but we're still operating at ThreatCon Delta. There are 5 more people in this house who are trepidatiously monitoring their innards for any sign of gastrointestinal distress. The puke bucket remains strategically deployed, and any laundry is promptly processed in order to avoid a repeat of the Great Laundry Room Back Up of the year 2000. If memory serves me correctly, we lost a couple of sleeping bags in that particular battle, after we stuffed their puke-laden selves into plastic garbage bags with the intent of getting around to doing the laundry later.  Later never came; or, rather, it came too late to save those bags, unfortunate victims of seasonal stomach flu that they were.

That was also the vomiting event whose incredible blast radius and devastating collateral damage drove us to instate our "Vomit in Place" policy; but I digress.

In a rather futile attempt to forestall any more illness, I washed all the Ektorp slipcovers tha…

I'll Skip Lunch, Thanks

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Gosh, was it only a week ago that I had the temerity to state that no one has barfed around here in a while?  Time sure does fly when one jinxes oneself, doesn't it?  Here it is, only 7 days later, and Susie has decorated our powder room in recycled strawberry sauce from this morning's pancake breakfast.

Bright side - there is one extremely clean bathroom in my house right now.

In addition, Larry seems to have brought some weird virus home from his travels - part head cold, part sore throat, part just make you feel like you can't move around much.  After pushing through the work week, he's been sitting around like an old man all weekend, blanket over his legs, sipping his tea and obsessing over events in Ukraine (the guy was a Soviet Studies major, way back when there was a Soviet Union).  Since he has generously shared this virus with me, I've been having to lie on the couch to recover after going up the stairs.  It's like a weird glimpse of our lives 25 years…

DIY Science

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You know, I think that sometimes I sell my husband a little short.  I mean, here I am thinking that, while Larry is supportive of homeschooling our kids, he really doesn't do much on the academic end of things.  Oh, yeah, he's into taking them on history field trips - the kids have seen more costumed reenactors than I can count, and they are practically experts on maple-syrup making and ice cream churn cranking.  Other than that, though?  Not so much.

But this evening I learned that I am wrong.  Apparently, Larry invests a lot of time in researching educational science lab ideas on the Internet for the kids; why else would I have found this fascinating beer experiment video on one of my browser tabs this evening?

I mean, I'm SURE he Googled "Leidenfrost Effect" to find this video, and not "Fun Things To Do With Beer."  After all, the latter would be just too immature for a 46-year-old father of 6, don't you think?

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In other news, we are sick…

Extrovert For A Day

Brian made $70 shoveling snow the other day. That's just downright ridiculous.

Or maybe I'm just jealous....

Well, I received my (nicely worded) rejection email from Listen To Your Mother yesterday.  I guess they didn't want to feature a snappy piece about my son leaving the toilet seat up - I can't imagine why.  Not heart-felt enough, I guess...

I don't do heartfelt very well.

Or maybe I just didn't read it well.  Who knows? Part of me was bummed to learn I wasn't selected, and part of me was relieved that I wouldn't be standing ON A STAGE in May reading about toilet seats to approximately GAZILLION PEOPLE.

I mean, really, now - just WHAT was this introvert thinking, auditioning for something like that, anyway? I guess I was a tad bored and looking to shake things up a bit.  I mean, no one has vomited around here in ages. And no mice around, either.

And, as far as excitement goes, LTYM seemed a lot safer than bungee-jumping, say.

So it's a win-win,…

Have At It, Mother Nature

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Oh, praise be to all the gods, there is SNOW outside.  Our first great snow since 2010, and the children are suitably impressed.  Brian has already stumbled out the door, shovel over his shoulder and dollar signs in his eyes, in search of warmth-loving neighbors who want their walks shoveled and cars dug out; the rest of the kids soon followed suit, but with sleds instead of shovels, determined to turn out nearby sledding hill into an Olympic-worthy venue, complete with ramps and whatever else they dream up.

SNOW!

Those of you who do not suffer snow deprivation cannot even begin to appreciate how wonderful this is.  You know how traumatized we've been by 3 years worth of essentially snow-less winters?  So traumatized that I dreamed last night that we woke up and the grass wasn't even covered and the snow had stopped.  So when I REALLY woke up, I was scared to look.

SNOW!

Oh, you have to live in our busy area to appreciate the blessed quiet - airports shut down, cars off the ro…

When Bad Things Happen To Good Knitters

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This should be an awesome day - Larry and Brian off skiing, the girls playing at a friend's house, me with PLENTY of knitting time on my hands, right?  But, unfortunately, 2 of my 3 knitting projects are in a timeout for misbehavior, and the 3rd is being knitted on high-priced metal needles that mysteriously became bent, making for an inefficient knitting experience.

I'm thinking maybe you don't understand.  And that's all right, I don't really either.   I need to woman up and deal with my knitting problems, instead of passive-aggressively complaining about them online.  I need to face the fact that one set of two-at-a-time socks should have just been ripped back to the beginning 10 days ago, because I could have reknit them by now.  Instead, I keep waiting to do the more painstaking task of ripping back just to where I made the mistake, because that would SAVE ME TIME.

Gah.

And my scarf - my beautiful linen-stitch scarf, which was going along so swimmingly, has lo…

Not Dead Yet

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The children, generous souls that they are, have kindly gifted me the cold they have been passing around.  Naturally, that makes me feel like curling up on the couch with a good book and Words With Friends, in front of a roaring fire, while the ice melts off the trees outside and the wintry winds blow.

But, hey, I'm still a mom, so I didn't get to do that today.  Instead, I drove the girls to Girl Scouts, supervised schoolwork, told assorted young people to PUT THINGS AWAY DAMMIT, and made sure the laundry got done.  Such is the life I have chosen.

But in my next life?  I'm getting myself a salaried position with sick leave.



[Out Sick image: FMLA Insights]


Anyone Else Sick Of Cooking?

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Hey, no one noticed my question yesterday, so I'll try again. If you didn't have the kids to feed, what would you make yourself for dinner?  Personally, I'd be happy with granola and yogurt each evening - I'm sick of fussing about the kitchen when I'm already tired and just want to sit and knit. 

I'm not too sure I could sell Larry on that menu, though...

[Yogurt image: Love Grown Foods]

Super Bowl Lament

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NO ONE has invited us to watch the Super Bowl with them tomorrow.  What am I supposed to do, pay for cable TV myself?  Next thing you know, I'll have to buy my own guacamole, too. 

I think I'm making the wrong sort of friends.  Oh, yeah, I have the let's-watch-Downton buddies and the let's-go-on-knitting-retreats acquaintances; but, apparently, I have neglected to cultivate any friendships with people who actually like televised sports.  Dreadfully shortsighted of me, I must say.  Now I will have to wait until Monday to hear about all the commercials.

That's why we watch the Super Bowl, right?  The expensive commercials?  Which teams are playing, anyway? 

Anywhoo, I'm not going to be sitting around like Cinderella pining to go to the ball.  It's not like I don't have plans for tomorrow already.  I mean, I have to dash to the local yarn shop (LYS, for us insiders), due to another knitting emergency involving indestructible needles that I have somehow ma…