Friday, September 05, 2014

I Tried. I Really Tried.

I haven't posted because, now that it is September and back-to-school and all that, I have been trying to stay on top of things and focus on the things that are important (which - surprise, surprise - don't seem to include Facebook and blogging).  For a WHOLE WEEK I did that and (of course) was priding myself on accomplishing my goals, until I was repeatedly smacked in the face for the past 24 hours with things that I had apparently still dropped the ball on.

So I had to go beg forgiveness and grovel at the church office this morning to make sure Brian could go on the mandatory field trip for Confirmation candidates.  You see, when the office sent out the notice and the permission slip at the beginning of August, I promptly printed it out, filled it in, and placed it in my purse so that I could deliver it posthaste to the proper authorities.

My purse.  Which is where I found it yesterday, crumpled at the bottom.  Strike one.

And all those uniform items I ordered earlier this week for Rachel, so she could attend her next Civil Air Patrol meeting properly attired?  Turns out I didn't, actually.  Nope.  Strike two.

On Wednesday, our dryer started making a horrifying squeaking noise; and, being newly sworn to efficiency, I immediately sat down, looked up my Geek Squad customer protection service agreement number, and made the necessary phone call to schedule a repairman's visit for Friday.  Just like a real adult. Today I had the pleasure of informing the nice man who showed up that, actually, we didn't need him because the dryer stopped squeaking days ago but I had forgotten to cancel the visit.  Strike three.

By that point, I was ready to crawl under my bed and not come out until after Christmas, only I couldn't, because that particular space is filled with a set of dismantled bunkbeds.  Why? Because Larry decided last weekend was the perfect time to rip all the walls out of the girls' bedroom.  He does stuff like that.

Now, any bedroom shared by 2 girls has A LOT of stuff in it.  A LOT OF STUFF.  Most of which is now in my bedroom - you know, the room which I have spent months clearing out so that it could be a peaceful retreat from the rest of my life.  Currently, I can't even get to my bed without walking over mounds of stuffed animals and piles of laundry baskets filled with I don't know what-all.  On the other side  of my bed, a space I had lovingly carved out to hold my cute IKEA armchair and my yoga mat, reside BOTH mattresses from the girls' room.

Oh, and remember the bats?  You know, the ones living inside of the walls of the girls' bedroom? The ones we paid $550 to get rid of?  Well, Larry - when he ripped off the drywall - found a bat that had apparently been left behind.  It didn't move, so he supposed it was dead.  Being in a rush to attend a Labor Day picnic, he LEFT IT THERE.

When he returned, it was gone.  We assume it is in the attic.  But we don't know.  We do know that the weird brown stuff on the cinder block wall we uncovered is bat guano, though.  So now I am monitoring everyone for signs of Ebola.

AND Joan Rivers died.  I remember my mom laughing, listening to her. She meant so much to women of that generation.

How was YOUR first week of back-to-school?


  1. Oh man, I hate it when I fail at being an adult, especially when I actually put real effort in the trying. But of all the things that went wrong, it's the girls' room being torn up that sounds the worst. I can't even imagine having to step over all the junk my one daughter has just to go to bed. I feel for ya. Please tell me your husband is a quick worker.

  2. Well, I certainly feel for you. I just sent my girlfriend a belated birthday card, only to discover that I did remember to send her one in time for her birthday. Yep, that's two cards, and two phone calls. I call that one a win.

  3. That sounds like a tough week. The main thing that happened here is that my daughter lost her math textbook, five days into the school year. And that is not as bad as bats.

  4. Okay, just reading about your week makes me want to crawl under my bed. You're welcome to join me, there's plenty of room for two under my bed.... this week, anyway.

  5. It was a lot like that with a raging head cold and a first-time-ever experience of online high school. And physical therapy. And... Trumpet lessons?

  6. About like yours. It's the worst to actually BELIEVE you have your game face on only to whiff it constantly. I've had lots of those weeks. So humbling.

  7. wowza! mine was a bit like yours, without the bat!

  8. So ... "newly sworn to efficiency" is the best phrase ever. Also, it sounds like you need an arsonist on staff. Because bats and bunk beds, oh my.

  9. You'd think that back-to-school would be a non-issue for me, since I don't have children. But no. School start is the start of lousy traffic season, when my commute takes at least fifteen more minutes (and on random days doubles). And we have to leave the house twenty minutes earlier in order to mostly reliably get my husband to his train. (My commute sucks at 45 minutes- 1 hour plus- his is abhorrent- an hour and a half, which is only partially mitigated by being mostly on the train.)

  10. I paid actual $$ last summer for bat guano. Apparently it is fabulous fertilizer for tomato plants!

  11. Back to school means my oldest just started college, so I've had a week of shipping packages of things she forgot, only to get calls asking for OTHER things she forgot. It's getting ridiculous. I'm having trouble missing her actually.

    Bats? Just no. I would move to a hotel.