Saturday, February 17, 2018


Let it be known that, in over 26 years of parenting, I have never had the dubious pleasure of hosting a slumber party. Never.

Until tonight. Tonight Rachel has 4 friends over, and the whole experience is surreal. Who are these people? Why are they in my house? And why are they so loud?

Seriously, this house has been kids' friends central for about 2 decades, but no one has ever been this noisy. They'd go downstairs and play and half the time I didn't even know who was down there and who wasn't. But these teens tonight (including my Rachel)? Are being SO LOUD. Luckily, I can get 2 floors away from them to sleep, but still -- it's disturbing to have all this noise in my house at 11 PM.

In other words, I'm old.

Bright side - Rachel cheerfully cleaned her room and helped tidy the rest of the house in preparation for the party. That's one teen that works well with a little motivation. As for myself, I went above and beyond by purchasing ingredients for ice cream sundaes. I hope Rachel remembers today when it's time to put me in a nursing home.

2 cans of name-brand whipped cream, honey - TWO. I think that rates a private room.

I went with Brian to the Warby Parker at our mall yesterday, so he could get his glasses tightened. While we were there, he helped me pick out the frames for my next set of eyeglasses. That's actually his official job in our family - making sure we all sport stylish eyewear. It all started when Brian insisted on taking Larry there last year; helpful son that he is, he even texted me pictures of Larry in all the different frames he tried on.

Let's note Brian's extraordinarily high level of emotional intelligence here: he knew that a man can't be completely happy with his eyeglasses unless his wife is happy also. I mean, it's no surprise - Brian also understood the inappropriateness of buying one's spouse a bagel slicer for her birthday. My future daughter-in-law, whoever she may be, had better appreciate this guy.

My future eyeglasses

Anyway, things snowballed from there. Anna asked Brian to go with her when SHE picked out her glasses this past August. And Susie has already told him he's on call for when she gets her new prescription, which will have to be soon, since she's sort of bumping into walls around here.

The party is still going strong downstairs, but I have officially run out of steam. I'm going to shut myself in my room and pretend that our home has not been invaded by young folk of boundless energy and overactive vocal chords. I need some sleep, because Larry and I plan to be up bright and early to blast NPR's Weekend Edition Sunday from our kitchen radio, only one floor above our sleeping guests. Maybe we'll sit in the living room and talk loudly about boring adult topics, to boot. We may be old, people, but we've still got game.


  1. Perfect revenge. Ha! We had two couples here last night for dinner before their Sweetheart's dance. That meant that not only did I cook all day long, but we (all of the rest of the family) all had to skulk around the back rooms of the house until the couples left for the dance. They started eating at 6. I thought well, by 7 for sure they will move on. 8:30 was when we were finally able to creep out like rats and scrounge the leftovers. I was starving!

    1. So glad we aren't the only family forced to skulk!

  2. How did you manage having a non-sleepover house? Sleepovers around here are frequent, but my kids know (and are unenthusiastic about the fact . . . ) that I refuse to host the normal kind of sleepover. When I say lights out, I give them a few minutes and then I start threatening to have kids removed from the 'party room' and possibly sleep on the floor of my room.

    Love that you have an in-house glasses expert. Where was the equivalent of that family member in my life when I was in 6th grade and I ended up with the upside down variety. So trendy in 1983, but we weren't on the kind of budget that could swing new glasses when those upside downers went out of fashion in record time!

  3. My house is so small slumber parties sucked! TG that time is over lol

  4. Slumber parties are ALL THE TIME here and I've grown used to them. I never was the mom who had a "lights out" rule, but I do draw the line at midnight if they're still rowdy. Now I'm so old and tired I think I could sleep through about anything, though.

  5. My kids are so quiet that they don't even want to have friends over. We've had exactly 2 slumber parties between 4 children. EVER.