Apparently, I am going to spend my first free weekend in 17 years at what future generations will undoubtedly refer to as the Woodstock of Knitting. The gentleman at WEBS sounded a little shaken up yesterday when he relayed to me the information that a thousand people will be descending on his store just to hear the Yarn Harlot speak. Imagine, if you will, one thousand knitters all in one place. Having trouble? Me, too. All I can picture is people waving placards proclaiming, "Make sweaters, not war..."
Of course, first I have to get there. Free weekends aren't free, you know. Here was my list:
1. Wash every single piece of clothing in the house so that everyone has enough clean clothes for the trip to Grandma's and Grandpa's house
2. Make sure all those clothes are actually packed in people's individual backpacks.
3. Keep Susie from unpacking her backpack, repeatedly.
4. Feed Susie lollipops to get her to stop screaming after I confiscate her backpack.
5. Buy special car treats to keep everyone happy in the car
6. Clean all the crap out of the car so that we can fill it with fresh crap.
7. Vacuum the car, since it is the first time in 4 months that it has been clean enough to vacuum.
8. Periodically threaten that no one is going anywhere if they don't leave me alone long enough to get all this stuff done.
9. Rummage desperately through pantry for Coke. Settle for diet Coke instead.
10. Realize Diet Coke ain't gonna do the trick.
11. Spank everyone soundly and send them to bed.
12. Enjoy some peace and quiet and foolishly decide I'll have time to finish everything in the morning.