Thursday, September 18, 2008

As The Food Turns

[If you don't understand why I am showing you pictures of moldy food, please read the post that explains it all. After you read it, you still might not understand why I'm doing this (my husband sure doesn't); but at least you can say you tried.]

It's Wednesday! No, it's Thursday! I went to sleep early last night and never got around to posting. So, sue me. Here is the list of discarded refrigerator items:

1. A small amount of just-expired cole slaw (it would have been a lot more, but I foisted some off on a neighbor yesterday in order to avoid being humiliated today)

2. 2 baby red potatoes which were cooked to perfection in a pot of salted water. I have no idea why these were left over.

3. 1 1/2 egg sandwiches (yes, the tradition continues) (click on that, or you won't be in on the joke, and then all the other kids will laugh at you)

4. One Nalgene bottle (I know they are carcinogenic, leave me alone) with the remnants of some parsley tea I brewed up when I still thought that I had gall stones. It's supposed to help. No, it doesn't taste good. It tastes like old parsley. A friend of mine swears that it got rid of her kidney stones. It's also a natural diuretic and an excellent source of vitamin C. Look at what someone can learn when they are self-medicating! Isn't that great?

5. One small plastic container with some abandoned hummus in it (another victim of American refrigerators being too deep)

6. Some dessicated dill weed, left over from our pickle-making experiment. We don't know how the pickles turned out, because they are still pickling. I'm considering putting the dill back in the fridge and letting it dry out more, and then saving it. Will that work?

7. A who-knows-how-many-days-old chicken salad sandwich (on a hotdog bun) that I had thriftily made up from the last of the chicken salad in the happy assumption that someone would eat it the next day. No one did. Really, anything I wrap in foil and put in the fridge is doomed; it would be way more efficient if I wrapped it carefully in foil and then tossed it in the trash.

It's a smaller list than usual this week, probably because Larry's away and I've been underfeeding the children. But they are still well-nourished enough to keep whining and bickering, so I should probably cut back on the food even more. Just to see if it helps. In the interest of science and all...

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24 comments:

  1. Let me know if the slow starvation plan works. Will it make them lethargic, do you think? Or more feisty as they fight for sustenance? It's a tough call. Fine line. All that. But hey, I'm desperate for ideas over here...

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  2. Only time will tell...if only Larry doesn't get back before I've solidified my findings...

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  3. Glad to know I'm not the only one toss out food! And -- about community college as a money saver. Yes. But it's an entirely different community for your child as opposed to traditional school. As long as yours stays focused and doesn't fall to the wayside with the rest, s/he can get a terrific education! But the atmosphere is simply a bit less intellectual, a bit more chaotic.

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  4. Maybe instead of foil you should use plastic wrap; the kids could see what's there without having to actually peel back the wrap (too much work dontcha know?) and may even eat it. Especially if you keep up the starvation plan - there may not a be an egg salad sandwich next week.

    BTW, the header made me laugh as I too have wondered, "Why do I like reading about her rotten food so much?" Yet, here I am every Wednesday on the edge of me seat to see what you put up. At least the stream of old Salsa has come to an end. Progress?

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  5. No, don't do it. From my own experience, it just makes them even more cranky and hard to get along with. Large meals make them all mellow and plenty of carbs will make them sleepy.
    P.S. I didn't starve my son, he starved himself and is now tube fed and a much nicer child!

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  6. Bind the dill together with a rubber band or twist tie and hang it someplace to dry. I usually hang mine off my bakers rack. When it's dry enough so that pieces fall off it when you shake it, crumble it into a container and voila! Dried dill. Yum!

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  7. I've banned my tribe from eating any junk this week and they have gone on a starvation diet in protest.

    Parsley tea? You WILL do anything to avoid a doctor's office, won't you?

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  8. Did I miss a pickling post? And, after not buying groceries prior to vacation so things didn't spoil while we were gone, and then still not having bought groceries, after being home almost a week, my kids are down to eating brownies for breakfast. I could join you on that slow starvation train. ..

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  9. Maybe you should require Elijah to make reservations and start charging him for those egg sandwiches whether he eats them or not. He might wise up and stop wasting your food so much. I like the underfeeding of the children...and yes amy, the pendulum of risk swings wide in both directions on that one.

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  10. You should try putting a lovely bow on the sandwiches.

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  11. I don't know if your dill will dry in the fridge, but in the air it should. But I've recently found a couple of yummy recipes that you can use dill in. (We're using up extra dill from pickling as well.) So you might just want to enjoy it fresh in chicken vegetable soup or some other such thing that sounds yummy to you. Oh- and I think they get fiesty first, then go lethargic.

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  12. They only need bread and water...

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  13. Parsley tea and crystal light...tastes pretty good.

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  14. I'm totally in favor of underfeeding children to keep them in line.

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  15. Just do what I do - give them only bits of food off your plate when you eat - and only the healthy stuff. Kids are way overfed these days, there's no danger in cutting back. (maybe thats why mine moved in with grandma?)

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  16. If you really want to clean up your fridge situation send your 6'2, Water Polo playing son off to college--cuts your food consumption in half.

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  17. Anything in foil is doomed in our fridge, too. It is assumed to be pizza and if no one is in the mood for pizza it is never discovered.

    KEEP BELIEVING

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  18. Great news. I'm building a mold based penecillin experiment in my fridge. Head on over my way if you come down with something. We can totally hook you up.

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  19. "...it would be way more efficient if I wrapped it carefully in foil and then tossed it in the trash." *snort!* How true. In my house the question is always, "Shall we throw it away now, or put it in the fridge and throw it away later?"

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  20. Oh I need a life. I am hooked on what is in your fridge! ACK!

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  21. You gave expired coleslaw to the neighbors? I hope you don't give Fridge Baskets at Christmas.

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  22. It wasn't expired yet. Just on the verge...and I had them sign a liability waiver.

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  23. I am tellin' ya, you should be winning awards, left over right, for this stuff.

    Someday, I will post my fridge, just for you.

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  24. Love the fridge posts! After being frustrated for too long with food that went untouched for too long, (and a fight with my husband about untouched salad he requested one week and then said, "but you kept feeding me other things for dinner!" WHAT??) I have now instituted a new approach:

    On the fridge, right where the handle is, I have taped a piece of bright red cardstock with a printed title "What Can I Have To Eat?" under which I put sticky notes with contents of the fridge that require consumption before too many days pass...

    We'll see if it cuts down on the mold....

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