Saturday, February 14, 2009

IV Feeding Looks Better All The Time

Trying to lose a few pounds? Having trouble limiting your food intake? Just take a gander at this handy little article, and you should be reclaiming your girlish figure in no time! I'm not sure which parts of it are most helpful to me: is it the thought of rodent hairs in my cinnamon that suppresses my appetite, or the idea of plant lice [picture at right] in my beer? Oh, wait - I don't drink beer. So maybe it's the maggots that are allowed to be in my tomato paste that do the trick. Who knows?

I'm just glad there was nothing about Trefoils in there.

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13 comments:

  1. A friend went to buy rice in bulk at the health food store. When she opened the bin, several moths flew out. When she mentioned it to the manager, he said...oh don't worry about that, they just add more fiber! I throw out stuff that I find bugs in! YUCK

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  2. Hey, what's a little more protein?

    Hope all's well with your health!! That sounds stressful!

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  3. I thought the exact same thing when I saw the article. "Don't read this unless you want to lose weight."

    Heck, I have enough trouble with the bugs in my food that I can see. (Have a persistent flour beetle problem.) At least those you can pick out easily--of rice or pasta, anyway, I try not to think about the eggs that must be in there too.

    The rest...well...protein I guess.

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  4. I am not even going to click over to read that article.

    Ignorance is bliss, right?

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  5. I file this under the category of "what you don't know won't hurt you."

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  6. Thanks. I may never eat again.

    Chocolate is still OK, Right?

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  7. "mammalian excreta"??? Um, I'm a mammal, you're a mammal... but I'm not about to eat mammal poo! At least not on purpose. GROSS.

    I bought a large bag of name-brand raisins, dumped those delicious morsels into clean Tupperware, and sealed the lid. A month later, I opened the lid and found many dead moths that had tried to get out.

    You'd think this WOULD help me lose weight. But as Mom on the Verge says, "Hey, what's a little more protein?" Esp. if it is in my chocolate. Or Trefoils.

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  8. I am too scared to open the article.

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  9. If I buy a 25 pound bag of flour at costco in the summer, I store most of it in the freezer. Otherwise we get those little weevils? hatching in it. Every food product is allowed to have a percentage of bug parts in it. Extra protein?

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  10. Ok - I should not have read this directly after eating breakfast. Seriously.

    In your header, you don't mention that the "vomit" portion could actually be your readers!

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  11. I know that last part didn't make much sense grammatically but you know what I mean.

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  12. OK, I understand that it's all "extra protein" and stuff, but ya, I'd rather NOT get my protein that way. I guess it's good we can't see all those "things" in our food. Most of the time.

    I don't think I'm gonna eat again for a while...til next time, anyway.

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  13. ...and just to be devil's advocate, yeah, I've gotten kitchen moths in my CHOCOLATE CHIPS! Little larvae that grow into those moths.

    I now store my flours, rices and dried legumes in the chest freezer to try to minimize the problem. At least of the hatchlings.

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