Wednesday, November 17, 2010

What's Bugging Me...

Today, talking to another mother at Girl Scouts, I flicked my hair back over my shoulder and a centipede fell onto my hand and onto the floor.  After rushing to the bathroom and disinfecting my hand and waiting until the urge to throw up subsided, I returned to the scene of the crime and calmly carried on, my conversation-mate eyeing me a tad uneasily.

Then, in a desperate attempt to find the missing Harmony 8" DPN (size 5) required to knit Rachel's hat, I emptied my knitting bag onto the table between us.  No DPN was found, of course, as they never come when you call them.  I returned all the flotsam and jetsam (including a granola bar, 2 measuring tapes I can never find when I need them, and a misbegotten practice pom-pom) to the bag, leaving behind on the table one hitherto-undiscovered dead stinkbug.

"What's THAT?" my friend said, staring at the motionless creature lying Kafka-esque-like on its buggy back, legs up.

"What?" I said, pretending I saw nothing.


"THAT!" she said, pointing.  "It looks like a dead stinkbug."

"Oh, heh-heh, I guess it is," I said, excusing myself to go throw up again.
 

I feel like the Typhoid Mary of bugs.  An entomological leper, if you will...

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12 comments:

  1. oh typhoid mary of bugs, this is disgusting! ;-)

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  2. You have my sympathy - we found a centipede on our media room floor yesterday morning and I about threw up as well! I covered the darn thing with a bowl until the hubby could be summoned to remove it from the premises. I know we are supposed to love all of God's creatures, but seriously, WHAT was he thinking when he made those disgusting things?!

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  3. You'd hear me screaming from your house if a centipede had been in my hair. No joke.

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  4. Please, allow me to add: AHHHGGHH AUUUUGGGGGHHH AHHH (Breeaath) AUUGGHHH AAEEEIIIII!

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  5. I have an alive stinkbug in a jar on my kitchen counter. My daughter wanted to save it. Just thought you might like to know....

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  6. I had a spider crawl up my butt a couple of weeks ago, and my DH *POINTED IT OUT* to me. Cue panic attack. Afterward, he said he'd never seen my legs move so fast in the entire time he's known me. I'm just glad I kept the bile at bay. I'm not sure if a centipede is better or worse. *shudder*

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  7. The sun came back out today after being in hiding for a couple of days, which means I caught (in a small glass of soapy water) 3 stinkbugs on my living room window. I'm currently ignoring 2 dead stinkbugs on the floor, in hopes that someone else will pick them up and throw them away.
    And yesterday, while in bare feet, I told one of my kids to please put on shoes and smash a bug on the kitchen floor.
    But we don't have centipedes. Yet.

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  8. Any bug in hair is justification to drink heavily or spend copious amounts of money on a hobby--recovery is important in such times. URGENTLY important.

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  9. At least you find your dead bugs. I thought I killed one giant moth in my living room and have never found it.

    The other night there was a giant spider on the ceiling and when I looked 4 minutes later IT WAS GONE.

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  10. Please tell me the centipede did not look like the one in your picture...if so, *I* may go throw up!

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  11. yeah, those centipede thingies - truly gross. Blech. Stinkbugs are just primordial-looking and annoying. But I definitely wouldn't want one in my purse.

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