Thursday, December 06, 2012

In Which I Fail At Acceptance



I would love to write something interesting here, but you know what?  All I can think about is the way my husband has WRECKED OUR HOUSE.  I'm trying to be all Zen about this, you know, I really am.  I keep telling myself that, hey, SOMEDAY the room will be finished and who CARES if the New Year's party I throw EVERY YEAR doesn't happen this time, it's not the end of the world, for heaven's sake, there are people starving in Africa, etc., etc...

But then I get to the part where I remember that Larry TORE ALL THE WALLS OUT OF OUR OPEN DEN, leaving only bare cinderblock and a fireplace mantel ripped from its moorings; and I see all the den furniture crammed into our tiny townhouse-sized living/dining room and I realize that it's DECEMBER and there's NO ROOM FOR THE CHRISTMAS TREE; and I note that there doesn't seem to be any sort of daily renovation progress happening, because Larry thinks it's OKAY to destroy the house on one weekend and then wait for some other weekend to fix the mess, and then...

Well, then, I sort of flip out all over again. 

I am SO going to IKEA this weekend.  Because, really, what we need right now is MORE FURNITURE.  And bath rugs - lots of bath rugs.  

Never underestimate the soothing powers of TOFTBO.

Don't even try to reason with me on this one.

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20 comments:

  1. I know you say you're not patient, but he's still alive, isn't he?

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  2. You might also need a Big Metal Chicken.

    I live all the way across the country and I'm flipping out over this twice daily, minimum.

    You already have all my sympathy. I'd totally go shopping with you (and I don't even like shopping!) even though I just had foot surgery one week ago.

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  3. IKEA therapy. Pick up some cinnamon rolls while you're there.

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  4. Sorry that your husband wrecked your house. I have one that might do something like that

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  5. It's time for a "theme" Christmas/New Year: Put up a ladder in the den and string THAT with lights! 5-gallon-paint-bucket "punchbowl" anyone? Set up some sawhorses and lay a door over them for a table!You get the idea... Oi.

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  6. I don't know what TOFTBO is, but it looks like very reasonable therapy to me.

    You could try temporarily converting to Judaism for the winter holidays. I have found that the Hanukkah menorah, while it creates a lot of wax mess, is a lot less trouble to deal with than a Christmas tree. The big trouble is figuring out how to spell the name of the holiday.

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  7. I know a perfect place to put the Christmas tree, but I don't think you could fit any ornaments on it, if you know what I'm saying.

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  8. Retail therapy may help you take the edge off...plus it burns calories, unlike Snickers Therapy.

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  9. I have that exact bath rug. I guarantee it will ease your pain.

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  10. oh dear. that is a lot to try to be zen about. chaos in the home does not promote calm. hoping retail therapy will help!

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  11. I hope it will be worth all your aggravation now, when the den is finished someday!

    Thanks for entering the Olay give away on my blog.

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  12. Bath rugs are comforting. Maybe it can be a new level of chic to festoon bare studs with Christmas greenery?

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  13. I am so sorry, but this saga has made me snort my coffee so many times already. And -- I lift you up as a model of forbearance. My head would have exploded by now.

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  14. Here's a link to a Christmas present idea for Larry. Maybe it will get him going.
    http://www.thisoldhouse.com/toh/photos/0,,20244719,00.html

    You know how Sheldon and Leonard have a roommate agreement on Big Bang Theory? I think it might be time to draft one for Larry.


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  15. Put up a ladder and string IT with lights, take a door off its hinges and place it over two saw horses for a table, then mix up a nice big 5-gallon paint bucket of punch, bathmats all around for cozy seating and call it a party.

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  16. OMG what a freaking nightmare. Maybe you could just stay at Ikea until it gets fixed.

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  17. Hmm. Greet him at the door every night with a sandwich and tell him you fixed a really quick dinner so he'd have time to work on the den that evening?

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