I will admit right here, I'm a fanatic on the subject of head lice. I can recite all sorts of facts about life cycles, methods of killing, avenues of contamination. My family has been so traumatized by what we refer to as The Year of the Head Lice that I am not even able to be funny about it. (See? No hyperlinks to previous posts) Yes, it was that bad. (No pictures, either - no way, no how...)
And now? I find this AP article which almost made my head explode (oh, but hey, that would take care of any resident lice, now wouldn't it?).
Apparently these people who want to allow children with "only" nits in their hair to attend school do not understand that you can't always see the hatched bugs. They are that fast and that small. By the time you can see them, they are leaving the host and finding new heads to inhabit.
In addition, having lice is "no big deal"? Really? So says Dr. Barbara Frankowski, a pediatrician who has, ahem, studied the subject. I'm willing to bet that Dr. Frankowski has never experienced an infestation herself. She has never had the pleasure of making her kids lay their heads on the kitchen table for an hour at a time (and don't move, dammit!) so that she could search for lice and their eggs. She has never had to do umpteen loads of laundry - bedding, clothing, coats, hats, you name it - every day for 2 weeks. And I'm sure she has never confiscated armies of stuffed animals from her crying children and stuffed them in a plastic bag for two weeks. All this while trying to keep a household running...
Oh, and let's not forget the constant vacuuming, and the crying, neglected baby, and the heightened awareness of every single time her children's heads touch something (or worse yet, each other). And how about the PTSD, the visual flashbacks of actually spotting things crawling (Lord help me) all over her precious, snuggly children's heads? The inability to go for a haircut without taking Valium first? No big deal, hey?
Folks, if there are nits, there are lice. Guaranteed. Keep your kids home and spare others the work and expense (and trauma - have I mentioned the trauma?) of a lice infestation, okay? Thanks.
Now I'm itchy.
What did I use to read before I spent hours scouring the Web for interesting news articles and fun blogs? Books, maybe? How dull. And don't you think Jane Austen would have made a great blogger? Here she had to waste time penning all those long novels, with nary a meme in sight. Poor girl...