Wednesday, December 02, 2009

Family Values

I guess I should have seen it coming. I mean, considering the gambling habits I foist on my children (on Thanksgiving, no less), I should have at least been on my guard. But no - I tend to forget that our family has gradually morphed into the weird variety, a far cry from the perfection I aspired to when I had but 2 wee ones to look after.

There I was at a girl scout meeting this afternoon, surrounded by wholesome homeschooled girls and their zealously nurturing mothers. I had to leave early with Susie, you see, as a dental appointment beckoned (I know! The excitement! How can y'all stand it?).

"C'mon, Susie," I coaxed. "Time to go home - David will play a game with you while I'm at the dentist."

"Game?" said Susie.

"Yes, a game! What do you want to play? Uno?"

I think I need to mention here that 4-year-old Susie has the lung capacity of an opera singer and the sort of volume that renders amplifying aids such as megaphones completely unnecessary.

"No!" she said, projecting her amazing voice throughout the entire meeting room. "I want to play POKER."

Precocious little thang, isn't she? We're right proud of her.

13 comments:

  1. It's a pity we can't start with the last child and work our way backwards. I let so much more go with the third than I did with the first. I'm positive I'm a better parent for it.

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  2. With a little more practice you can skip the Dental appointments and hit Vegas baby.

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  3. I played Black Jack with my kids to have them practice their addition. Betting pennies and nickels. Wonder what the 2nd grade teacher thought of that.

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  4. I love your family values!

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  5. I hope you told them that Larry was the one who taught her how to play poker.

    If she wants to play poker then apparently you didn't traumatize her too much on Thanksgiving.

    So, is she any good? Is there some sort of poker badge or something that she can earn when she's a girl scout?

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  6. mother of the year for you

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  7. What? It's not okay to teach your kids to gamble?

    It's their allowance! Far be it from me to tell them they can't lose it back to me in a healthy game of poker, right?

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  8. Just think of the fun things she can say during the children's message at church!

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  9. Like when my little angel announced in the lemonade line at the school picnic, "My dad wants lemonade, but my mom drinks beer." Come to think of it, she was 4 at the time.

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  10. Hahaha! Next thing you know you'll make it "interesting" and take back all her allowance in a single hand...

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  11. You've raised her right, my friend.

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  12. At least she didn't say craps.

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