Monday, April 05, 2010

Yarn Therapy

Larry's away. I'm not. He left the car at the garage for an inspection while he's gone. The mechanic just called and essentially - after saying incomprehensible things about belts, freon, and main engine mounts (?!) - got me to agree to spend all our money on tuning up our 6-year-old Honda Odyssey.

Something about the engine not falling out on the road....sounded sort of urgent to me...oh, yeah, and something about the radiator...that's important, too, right?

So! Without even going to IKEA, I managed to spend over a thousand dollars today. And the kicker? Larry doesn't know about it yet. Gosh, I wonder if he bothers to read my blog while he's away? Hi, honey! Enjoy your trip!

Meanwhile, we are being inundated with creepy crawlies here. The sugar ants woke up and said, "Hey! Let's go back to that house we always invade this time of year!" The stink bugs are supposed to be staying outside now that the weather is warm, but they didn't get the memo. There are a couple of unidentified creatures with wings that I've had to get rid of (I drowned one with Tilex in the bathroom last night - hasta la vista, baby!). The centipedes are beginning to show up in force.

By the way, this thing here? As seen on TV? Doesn't work. I want my money back.

[Photo credit: Taylor Gifts]

I haven't even regaled you with tales of our pantry moth infestation, have I? Maybe because I don't want to relive the experience of Theo's finding larval grubs at the bottom of the raisin container he was snacking from. Stoic that he is, he didn't puke, even though there were raisins in his mouth at the time. If it had been me, I think I would have had to have been physically restrained from ripping out my own tongue. After vomiting up my tonsils, that is...

We refrigerate everything now - as if the refrigerator wasn't overcrowded enough.

Let's recap - unplanned motor vehicle expenditures, spousal abandonment, and insect invasions...hmmm...I need something to take the edge off...something...

Tell me - how much hand-painted sock yarn does this sort of situation require? And do you think I should order several balls of each shade of Swish? I mean, "Swish" is such a cute name for a yarn, you can't knit just one.

I think I need some larger-size circulars, too. Oh, and cotton - look at those fun colors! Lucky for me, I have a baby grand-nephew on his way...

Ah, living well is the best revenge...


  1. We just found out we have termites. What kind of therapy should I have for that?!?

  2. WEBS is having their anniversary sale. Not to be an enabler or anything, but my husband is in danger of losing residency, he's been gone so much, and I am all for some well-placed retail therapy.

    I also had a pantry moth issue, about six years ago, but it absolutely scarred me. Empty out your cabinets, throw away anything at all suspicious (they can munch through plastic bags, too), refrigerate as much as possible, put the rest in heavy duty ziploc bags in the cabinet, but before you put anything back, spray the entire thing down with white vinegar. Make sure you get it down into the cracks. Wipe it all down. Do that EVERY WEEK for about three or four weeks, to make sure you get all the eggs, and you should be all set. Also, and THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. Even though pantry moths and wool moths are technically different species, I have it on good authority that pantry moths will eat yarn if it happens to be around. Protect your yarn, too.

  3. I don't know how much "swish" costs, but I say spend 250. What with the grand gone already, Larry won't even notice. Can you knit an ant trap? Hi Larry! Hurry home!

  4. Oh. My. Gawd. I recommend wine. Or whiskey - for you and Larry both. agh. I'm trying to remove my own tongue....eeeeeewwww! Poor Theo. Poor you. Gah.

  5. I found a bunch of crushed cereal under our sofa, and what do you think was crawling all over it? Weevils. In our carpet.

    I wanted to set the house on fire but I thought that might be a tad excessive.

  6. ooooh pretty therapy!!
    I've been pining for a set of the Knit Picks Interchangeables for a while now... *whine*

  7. I just saw some roaches in the kitchen. They probably came home from work with us in our lunch bags. Hubby leaves his bag on the floor under his desk after he eats. I'll have to make sure the exterminator sprays specifically for them next month? She said the only thing she knew of that would kill those stink bugs is liquid seven, but they do not use iot anymore because of it's negative affect on beneficial insects, like honey bees. I may get some to spray behind the new trim we are installing before we put up the new gutters. I saw several there.

  8. The pantry moths are definitely enough to send a woman over the edge --Out, damn grubs!-- my tonsils are gagging at the thought. You definitely deserve to buy all the yard you desire... Or at least a few skeins and the services of an exterminator for the rest of your life.
    I'm about to go crazy from the stinkbugs (I nearly broke my ceiling fan last night trying to kill one), and that was before my husband found 4 carpenter ants making their way across the kitchen floor. They might have been headed for the pantry...
    Obviously, I need to take up knitting.

  9. Oh, pantry moths! I have an enormous pantry and I couldn't get rid of those things. Everywhere. I cleaned the entire pantry out which took a whole day and threw out anything that even had the potential of moths, but still they came back. I couldn't figure it out and then I realized, the shelves are adjustable, so there are all these holes in the sides. Hundreds of holes. Hundreds. I poked a toothpick through one of the holes and sure enough larvae. They were nesting in those holes. After a thorough cleaning out, we now refrigerate all of the moth's favorites. We buy a lot of rices and things at the Asian market. They were hitching a ride through the rice bags.

  10. Get the swish! That is pretty yarn.
    Ack--car trouble, computer trouble--it's all awful stuff. But I hear horses are expensive to keep, too.

  11. ewwwwwwwwwww to the bugs in the raisins! I woke up to ants all over my counters, the stove and into my trashcan, lovely! I swear, my house is built on an ant hill. we had rain yesterday, whenever we have rain, the ants come!

  12. I have more knitting needles bought for therapeutic purposes than I know what to do with. Which I don't. My knitting is still, how shall we say, elemental.

  13. Bwa ha ha. Guess I won't complain about two small ants seen on my desk. But I'm definitely buying ant traps tomorrow.

  14. There are pantry moth pheromone traps, and they work. Buy lots. Their only drawback is that the glue capture area isn't big enough when you have a big invasion--ask me how I know. And yes, they absolutely will eat yarn, but not as a first choice.

    I set up those traps and when it was bad, set loops of clear packaging tape near them and caught more. One thing is that even the ones that don't land on it will go to it and do mothy flirtations and it will concentrate the population in one squishable area.

    Or don't squish: go to the hardware store and get one of those tennis-racket-shaped bugzappers. You push a button in the handle as you swing to turn them on. You don't have to touch the electric screen part, you don't have to be exact when you swing, and you get to hear them fry--we got ours for two bucks apiece, go buy each of your kids one. (And if they thwack each other, it shocks good and hard but won't permanently hurt them. Said the klutz who... Yeah.)

    Good luck!

  15. Ugh! But I can tell you I'd rather that than the big hairy spiders we have! We have centipedes, too,but I have only seen one. But my son, who lives in the basement, said he saw one that was abut a foot long. THAT would freak me out!