Whew! I went missing. I didn't run away from home with my gambling winnings, in case that is what you were thinking...but I did fall asleep early, directly after informing Anna that she wasn't going to her ensemble rehearsal in the evening as planned. Because, if she's gonna make me feel like crap all day, I'm gonna make her life miserable.
Then I went to bed and slept the sleep of the just.
It amazes me how teen daughters think that they can out-b*tch their mothers. Don't they realize that we've had way more practice than they have at acting that way?
For those of you with only cute, younger children - I apologize. 5 years ago, I would have been as shocked to read this as you are feeling right now. Obviously, I have done something wrong with raising my offspring.
Ha, ha, ha, ha! That was a joke! For mothers of teen daughters to share! We've done nothing wrong - it is merely a case of demonic possession amongst our young. Why don't you 20-somethings go off and make some more playdough for your darling tots, all right? You can leave us old witches here to discuss how to torture the ungrateful teens that we cherished and nurtured all through their early years, just like you are doing with your small children now.
I don't know what's wrong with me this morning. Maybe 10 and a half hours of sleep isn't good for my psyche. It felt good, though. That is, until I staggered downstairs to find the dishwasher unrun, and the kitchen smelly, and the "left over" dishes scattered, willy-nilly, here and there. (My kids, as I have mentioned before, are union workers; they only wash the dishes that are in the sink - any left on the counter, no matter how dirty, are outside the terms of their contract)
Did you click on that link? Why not? Trying to rush off to some other blog? Don't be rude, click on it! It's funny, dammit.
Anyone want to go upstairs and wake Anna? The younger kids won't do it for me anymore. Even little Susie says it's "scary." I could save myself the trouble of dealing with her and let her sleep in, but she might like that. So forget it.
I have a dentist appointment today. Did I mention that? It's at one o'clock. Because I was smart this time and didn't let Larry make the appointment for me. If I had let Larry make the appointment, I would be there already.
Which may not have been such a bad idea, actually - because then he would have been stuck with the job of waking Anna...