Sunday, May 11, 2008

A Pox On Mother's Day Bake Sales

The title of yesterday's post should have been Friends Don't Let Friends E-Mail When They Are Totally Tired, Cranky, and Fed Up - but I thought that would be too lengthy. I regret if I may have inadvertently led some of you to believe that I was actually tipsy when I wrote that e-mail to my friend. I assumed that my typical reader (aka, another mom) would know that that sort of missive could be penned on almost any typical day by almost any mother without the aid of intoxicating beverages.

Truth to tell, I don't drink. Oh, occasionally I will sip some wine and try to enjoy it. But I do not like the taste of alcoholic beverages. MadMad can attest to this, having dined out with me while we were stalking the Yarn Harlot. While those around me were enjoying whatever those drinks are that have salt (or was it sugar?) on the rim of the glass, I was enjoying a nice refreshing glass of water. With lemon. I'm weird that way.

Larry took me out for a sandwich at our local bagel shop this morning (I know, I know, all you moms are jealous), where we were able to hash out in peace (i.e., without a zillion interruptions and without teens listening in and promising themselves to never, ever make the mistake of getting married) how to balance Larry's desire to attend his niece's wedding on Labor Day weekend and my desire to not have our August vacation plans completely ruined. Once I was able to vent for 5 minutes - all about how if his family really wanted us to be there, maybe they should have asked when we could make it and maybe they should have realized that traveling on Labor Day weekend involves a colossal amount of traffic, which I guess they couldn't even imagine, since a traffic jam to them is anything more than 3 cars on the road at once (okay, so maybe I vented for more than 5 minutes) - anyway, after I had said my piece, we actually had a constructive discussion where we both agreed the situation sucked but, come hell or high water, we were going to make it to the nuptials with all the kids anyway.

Come to think of it, perhaps I am not giving his family enough credit. Maybe they purposely scheduled the wedding on Labor Day weekend, in hopes that we wouldn't be descending on their celebration with our kid-heavy clan. I wouldn't blame them, really.

After this thoroughly fun and romantic conversation, Larry treated me to a kid-sized hot cocoa at Starbucks. Then I picked out a new booklight at Barnes and Noble and he paid for it and handed me the bag and then I opened it and pretended to be surprised.

Yes, Larry does know how to show a girl a good time. Why do you ask?

Later today, I spent over an hour at the bookstore (all by myself), reading knitting books. And Larry watched the kids all by himself. Everyone was still alive and unharmed when I came home. Which means that they fared better than if I had been the one stuck in the house with them on a rainy Sunday.

I informed Anna (before I went out) that her gift to me would be making the potatoes for dinner while I was out. She accepted this task with her usual grace and good humor. It was a touching moment. And to think I gave birth to that child without the benefit of painkilling drugs. And that I spent all of last Friday in the kitchen baking multiple loaves of banana bread for the teen workcamp fundraiser - the Mother's Day bake sale.

I do hope that you all are seeing the irony of holding a bake sale on Mother's Day. The teens' mothers slave away Friday and Saturday baking breads and cookies (Happy Mother's Day!), then all the dads and kids buy these baked goods after Sunday Mass to bring home and give to Mom, who of course oohs and aahs over their gift and then feeds it to them. That is, if she hasn't already run away from home, due to a surfeit of baking duties.

Frankly, if a mother is going to consume those sort of calories on Mother's Day, they'll be from some good quality chocolate, not from some crappy baked goods that some other poor mom had to bake under duress. Not that I am bitter or anything...



  1. I think weddings, in general, are big excuses to act like a PIA to everyone else and get away with it. I sort of regret I didn't take advantage of that opportunity when I had it (and also, I had to buy my own set of pans, well into my marriage, when I just couldn't take buying nice, pricey registry gifts for ONE MORE BRIDE whom I knew for a fact couldn't and didn't cook, while the handles of my pans fell off on a regular basis).

    Will you be driving through RI? Stop in and say hi. :)

  2. Mother's Day Bake Sale? Who thought of this one? Never mind. I don't want to know. I don't like any bake sales any more; I've stopped baking for them. I'll buy something or make a donation instead.

  3. Yeah, mother's day bake sale. Not a good idea. I did love your surprise gift though. I usually pay for and even sometimes wrap mine (not for mother's day, Christmas though)

  4. I've always found bake sales to be pretty ironic--you want me to give away my really good stuff and then spend money to either buy it back or take a flyer on someone else's stuff. I'd rather just bake and eat my own stuff.

    Can you go early to the wedding to add vacay time on and avoid traffic?

  5. At least you had your husband home with you on Mother's Day. Mine called from the city the army has sent him to this time, and told me he'd had a lovely day taking photos and sipping tea on the banks of the Yarra River. Meanwhile, I was cleaning up spilt fizzy drink and a burnt-out microwave. But I did have enough sense to blog about it.

    I was only dumb enough once to participate in a Mother's Day Cake Stall. I do sometimes learn from my mistakes.

  6. Maybe bitter but very funny.

    The mom's day bake sale? That is truly ridiculous.

  7. Now it all makes sense. You're half mormon. No alcohol, large family, knitting.


  8. AnonymousMay 12, 2008

    A singleton at a family party last weekend whinged that she always had to travel to her brothers house for Christmas (he has 3 small people)....
    ....was I supposed to feel sorry for her?
    He has -

    a a big house that everyone fits in.
    b 3 small children
    c animals
    d 3 small children

    I did try to explain to her what it's like travelling long distance with SMALL CHILDREN (for this read, squabbling, crying, sicking up, tired etc, etc - YOU know)!
    I hope she has triplets (no, make that septuplets) one day, that might make her appreciate how easy it is to travel solo!

  9. AnonymousMay 12, 2008

    I hope there were cupcakes...

  10. Larry is way more romantic than my hubby. He asks "what'd you get you" when I get home from the greenhouse.

  11. Yeah, that Mother's Day Bake Sale thing sounds like a scheme concocted by men to have a good breakfast with little work on our "special day". I don't buy it. Luckily for me there is this nice little Amish bakey close by and that's where I do my pseudo baking for such events. There are perks to living in the country.

  12. Cruel and Unusual punishment...Mother's Day BAKE SALE? What a Lousy idea!
    DH went on-line and ordered a statue of St Joseph the Worker for me that I have wanted for, oh, six years or so. He printed out the confirmation e-mail and gave it to me! Whoo Hoo. At least that means that I can open it as soon as it arrives!
    Happy Day! Pax, EJT

  13. we have the same gift exchange program at my house:

    purchase together.
    open paper bag.
    act surprised.
    roll eyes.

  14. Oh ~ I am so with you on the bake sale thing! That's just wrong! And any kind of function or bbq at the home of any mother is wrong, no matter how much they all say, "You won't have to do a thiiiiing!" Ha! Yeah, right!

  15. Mother's day bake sale????
    Which man thought up that one?
    "Hmmmmmm, we get the women to do all the work, we fork out a little bit of money, and then we get to eat the gift."

    Saturday afternoon, (after trying to pass off our new home security system as a Mother's day gift) my DH asked me what I wanted for Mother's day. I told him we couldn't afford what I wanted. (A nice set of patio furniture) He agreed, we couldn't afford it. Plus, he pointed out that we don't have a patio, so we wouldn't have any place to put it, and we couldn't possibly just sit it on the grass.

    Men and their lawns.

    My 7 yo bought me a half pound candy bar with his own money! I guess you know who my favorite child is this week.

  16. AnonymousMay 12, 2008

    That does seem sort of redundant doesn't it?

    Why not just bake a batch of brownies, throw them on the dining room table and say, "There, have at it, I'll be in the tub."

    Oh, and I often buy my own presents, wrap them and then give them to Hubby to give to me.

    That way at least one of us is surprised.

    Great post.

  17. I'm joining the unanimous voices who think the Mother's Day Bake Sale is ridiculous.

    At our church, the teens have a flower fundraiser where mothers can buy annuals or perennials for their gardens. The kids make a lot of money for their summer mission trip, and we always spend Mother's Day afternoon planting flowers. :)

  18. AnonymousMay 12, 2008

    That is crazy. Weddings on holidays are presumptuous. More so than mother's day bake sales (that's got to be an oxymoron or SOMETHING).
    They need a "Mother's Day Free babysitting kiddie corral." Duh.

  19. OK, that bake sale thing sounds like the seventh circle of hell. That is just plain ol' mean.

  20. The yourself...the ONLY way to go to them.

  21. PTO parents should be banned for life if they even suggest something as stupid as a Mother's Day bake sale.

    I don't know how you manage 6 kids without drinking. You're a better woman than I am.

  22. A Mother's Day Bake sale?!? Someone has sniffed too much glue that came up with that one.

  23. Sounds like a pretty good day after all of that. I do think the Mother's Day bake sale is the lamest fundraiser ever. ugh.

  24. I'm with Jill on this one. Only a man would think a Mother's Day Bake Sale was a good idea.

    One of the things I love about Mr. Smith is that he truly has a talent for gift giving. It is always unexpected and perfect.

  25. You are a funny girl!

    BTW, the email - I totally write like that all the time. The only mind altering drug I need is my children, "mom. MOM. Mom. MOm. Momomomomommomomoomomoomomom! MOMMMMMMMMMMM!"

    Seriously, how can we not be clinically insane?

  26. was it a man in charge of the bake sale idea or a woman without children? I agree with you on that (well and most everything else) hehe Take care

  27. How about a Mother's Day wine sale? Now that makes sense.