Monday, January 23, 2017

Power Pants

Over the past year, as I kept tugging on the worn-out waistband of my spandex pants to keep them up during yoga class, I would think, "But I just bought these. These are my NEW exercise pants."

No - no, they weren't. I had bought them in January of 2014, when I hobbled back into the yoga studio. They were cheap. And they were finished.

My knees are in there somewhere

So I noticed an Amazon Deal-A-Day sale for exercise leggings last week. Only $15! But they were all of the patterned variety. Now, I'm a basic-black chick, myself, but for $15? I thought, Heck, everyone else wears patterned leggings - I can do this.

Look, I know it's not bungee jumping, but I've got to start somewhere, all right?

I wore them to yoga on Saturday, where I swear I felt the Power of the Pants. I mean, it probably helped that I didn't have to keep hitching up the waistband, but beyond that - they put the bark in my dog pose, the fierce in my warrior. I did keep mixing up left and right (as is my wont), but a fellow student cut me some slack by suggesting that maybe I had put the pants on backward by mistake.

I hadn't, but it was nice of him to give me the benefit of the doubt.

I went to yoga again on Sunday (because I am a rock star) and then came home to eat lunch and take Rachel to Costco to pick up her new eyeglasses. She was pretty much standing at the door, waiting, anxious to be able to see properly again. "Okay," I said, picking up my purse, "I'm ready, let's go!"

"I can wait," she said, "until you change your pants."

I looked down at my legs, wrapped in the splendor of black tiger stripe Spandex, and said, "No, I'm good - I've got this big sweatshirt on. It's cool! Everyone wears these!"

(Yes, let's note the role reversal here, folks.)

"I'll wait," she repeated.

So, yeah, not everyone appreciates the Power of the Pants. More fools they...


  1. Replies
    1. Well, apparently Rachel doesn't think so...

    2. "black tiger stripe Spandex"? No. Tigers have orange stripes. Get some orange tiger stripes, and meet Rachel to pick her up somewhere. Or carnelian red stripes.

  2. Ha! Let her deal! I love them.

  3. Dude.. those pants areally seriously freaking awesome. I SO need to get a pair- or ten- for roller derby practices.