Monday, January 19, 2009

Betrayal

We've been having a family UNO tournament of sorts. We've even got Larry playing. Mean mother that I am, this afternoon I caught Rachel out for not saying "UNO" and made her cry. A lot. Her cute braided pigtails made it seem even more pathetic. But, hey, she looked cute the whole time she was stuffing toilets and decapitating stuffed animals, too.

Larry felt sorry for her, but that's because he doesn't know how to compete.

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We bought a dishwasher back in August 2007, after summarily finishing off the old one we inherited with this house. This new appliance was my favorite dishwasher ever. It held everything, and didn't have lots of silly little compartments to get in the way of the large dishes and pans. I was, quite frankly, head over heels crazy in love with it. And I thought it felt the same about me, the way it faithfully scrubbed all our eating and cooking implements clean twice a day, every day, week in and week out.

Well, the love affair is over. It ended the way these things do, with blatant betrayal. Today we attempted to run it and discovered that the latch inside the door is broken. A cheap part, but an expensive problem. KitchenAid, you have broken my heart. And my wallet...

Silver lining (there had to be one, right?) - Anna gets to wash dishes by hand. Since she already thinks we are raising her Amish (no IPod, no cellphone), this situation should suit her just fine.

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Oh, Lordy, I can't believe it - Dustin Hoffman is back. I love Dustin Hoffman, with a devotion fierce and unchanging. Unlike that trampish Mrs G over at Derfwad Manor, I'm a one-secret-boyfriend type of gal (oh, hush about that Matt Damon thing - it meant nothing to me); and, really, how can a woman even think about making a guy like Dustin share his space in her heart?


Look at that, will you? Emma must be melting inside, with Dustin gazing at her that way. Look at those sexy eyes, that short stocky build...

Would someone open a window in here? It's so hot...

And, hey - do you think he does dishes?


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21 comments:

  1. All this tiime I've been on your side--but no iPod?!

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  2. Dish washers have become my pet hate. We have now had a series of them that expire within a short time AFTER their warranty ran out. The parts were obsolete and so we were left with a useless piece of junk. How can this sort of thing be good for our environment? Or my bank account? So now I wash up by hand and the last useless dishwasher just fills the gap under the bench. But I don't have any kids living at home any more. You have my sympathy.

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  3. I would take Dustin over Matt anyday.

    It's always the innocent looking ones who get you in the end.

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  4. My dishwasher, sadly, has left us. We've been meaning to go pick up a new one (my lovely parents gave us money for one for Christmas) but there just hasn't been time. Probably because we're stuck washing so many damn dishes.

    The UNO story remindded me of my Dad. When my brother and I were little, he never let us win. Never. Never even stocked the deck in our favor or "accidentally" moved our piece up a few spaces. Nothing. Then, one day I remember beating him at some game or another, and it felt soooo good, knowing I had won all on my own. I'm sure I did a (modest) victory dance, in all my glory. And what did my dear Dad say to this? "I let you win."
    Needless to say, my competitive streak is quite fierce.

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  5. When we bought our house it was a 'fixer upper.' I was 7 months pregnant and we had a to-buy list a mile long.

    In the kitchen there was a jurassic clothes washing machine next to the sink. Week one, we replaced it with a dishwasher.

    It was that essential.

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  6. Oh of course he does the dishes...he vacuums too. All our fantasy men do.

    He is a cutie.

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  7. Grannysaurus raises an excellent point, and hopefully you won't mind if I point out a video on this very subject. 'It's based on one woman's years-long research and immersion -- yet she manages to convey a critical environmental/social message to anyone, even young children, in a way that challenges, entertains and inspires. It is not anti-commerce; it only raises awareness of the problem of artificial wants and unconscious consumerism gone wild, and the consequences to ourselves, to future generations, and to our home planet.' Anyway, it's at:
    http://www.storyofstuff.com

    PS, I'd take Dustin over Matt as well...

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  8. I really loved Dustin in Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium.But I'm more of a (not so) secret Mel Gibson woman.

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  9. Hey!! CNN just showed Dustin Hoffman in the crowd at the inauguration. Thought of you...

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  10. Totally NOT sexy. Dustin has never done anything for me.

    I'm just as pathetic as I was in high school - I have a secret crush list, but no secret boyfriends. Sigh.

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  11. By the way, no ipod, no phone? Do you make her drive the mule train to school? Mean mom. ;)

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  12. Had to repair a very new GE dishwasher last year--frustrating!

    But it does fit the Amish theme very well.

    Blessings!

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  13. Okay, don't go to my blog today because I don't want you to feel bad.
    You are right--the children need to learn how to lose. It builds character. Just like doing dishes.
    Dustin had me in Tootsie. I loved him in that movie.

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  14. you know, you gave birth to your child. and they have to learn to stick to rules. doing the UNO thing seems right to me. but i cheated to win chess against a 5-year old....oh that was an embarrassing moment!

    i really hope, your dishwasher can be replaced soon. for the sake of your Amish daughter who certainly did nothing to deserve this punishment! ;-)

    Franzi

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  15. Oh, more dearer to my heart than my garbage disposal is my dishwasher. Scrape the uneaten-by-by-toddler food into the disposal and then throw the dish into the dishwasher. That extra flick of the wrist says, "Oh sure, so now you kids won't eat THAT either!"

    And Dustin Hoffman? Eeeew!! Ben Affleck... Now that's a different story, especially in "Shakespeare in Love". Yummy...

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  16. "Secret" boyfriend? Oh, I've been bragging to my Hubby for years how my imaginary boyfriend does dishes AND cleans the bathroom.

    But alas, my Hubby's not the jealous type and all he says is, 'Good, now I don't have to feel bad about not doing it.'

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  17. I'd take Emma over Dustin myself.

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  18. Our Dishwahser konked out 6 monhts before our warrantee ran out. The guy came over and told us it would be more cost-effective to get a new one than to try to fix it. And since that clause was in our warrantee, we got a brand-new one. with it, of course, we got another 5 year everthing included warrantee again. I sure hope it konks out before the warrantee runs out too. ;)

    With our family size, we also run the dishwahser a minimum of once a day, sometimes twice a day. It is pretty crazy, isn't it?

    Dustin Hoffman is cute, you are right. I'm happy to hear he's coming back to movies, he's a great actor!

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  19. On the good side, a dishwasher that won't run is a great place to air-dry the dishes. Plus it keeps up the Amish image for your daughter. Oh, the tales she will be able to tell her children! I bet you make her walk 6 miles to school, uphill, both ways, in 10 feet of snow.

    Oh, crap. I just realized I forgot to run the dishwasher this afternoon.

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  20. You MUST teach that all-important Uno rule. In time, she'll appreciate being hyper-sensitive and aware of it enough to call others out and then she'll be a true Uno competitor...

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  21. I got thinking the other day I ought to show my kids how to heat something without a microwave. I am pretty sure at this point they would be totally lost with just a can, and a pan.
    You could do that too, just to inflict the most pain possible for your daughter.

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