Tuesday, December 11, 2007

Blog Business

I'm feeling bad for the poor unfortunate from Maryland who was googling "stomach flu large family" today and landed on my blog - apparently they went through all 33 pages, hoping to find some useful information. Not here, honey. All I've got are horror stories. And someone at a high-priced NYC law firm has been googling for a tornado costume. I find this puzzling. But that's okay - I'm sure they find me puzzling, too. And not at all helpful.

I don't know when I find time to analyze my sitemeter referrals so closely - probably when I'm neglecting the children and the laundry.

Like my tag cloud? Pretty, isn't it? I'm rather proud of myself. For those of you who asked, you need to log in to Technorati and look for the tag cloud widget. If I can figure it out, anyone can.

So, where's the funny? I don't know - I thought one of you took it. None of my children acted outrageous today. Or, if they did, I didn't notice. Anna was pleasant and helpful because she wanted to go to the mall with her friend this evening, Susie avoided mischief because she was a little under the weather and lay around all day looking cute and cuddly, the middle kids kept themselves busy with various sand art projects (and yes, there is colored sand everywhere now; but, frankly, I don't give a damn), and Theo was out working at B&N all day. He thought it was boring. Larry and I explained to him that that's why he has to go to college - so he can get a job that isn't boring. Or a job that is boring but pays way better than 8 dollars an hour. That advice represents the extent of our career counseling abilities.

Bunco tonight, and I lost. It's a stupid game anyway. And I spent 140 dollars (as in, way more than the 80 dollars I thought I was going to spend) having someone come to my house and explain the gas fireplaces to me. I think Larry's going to start taking the checkbook to work with him.

I called my father this morning and apologized profusely for forgetting to call him yesterday, on my parents' 51st anniversary. He was very upset with me - you know why? Because he forgot, too, and he was counting on me to remind him.

I avoided walking all last week, but now my neighbor is banging on my door again at 6:30 in the morning. Which is ridiculous, considering it is dark outside at that hour. I'm thinking of getting a restraining order. But until then, it's somewhat-early to bed and way-too-early to rise for this blogging mama - g'night all!


  1. Never a good idea to check those searches [often very scary]. I think everyone is up to their ears in it at the moment, I'm sure they'll forgive you.
    Best wishes

    This is my calling card or link"Whittereronautism"until blogger comments get themselves sorted out.

  2. I think a lot of men forget the important dates. It's just the way God made them. He made women to remind them!

    I need to go for a walk/run!

  3. I found out that I had several hits on my Blog from people googling the name of my husbands boss. Yikes! Luckily I said nice things about him, but still, probably not the kind of information the were looking for. So I learned my lesson and took his name out. The worst search is "wear a sari + fat". Are they talking to me? Good grief.

  4. I agree with Maddy...too scary. I had one searcher that wanted to see photos of Mary Alice nude. Nude? Nekkid maybe, but never nude, that's so pretentious.

    Bunco is a stupid game and I think you should be guidance counselors with your ability to succinctly nail down real career objectives.

  5. Don't know how you do searches. Not sure I wish to do so. Hope your brood feels better.

    I think it's the season. I haven't had an antic worthy day this week. Come on kids, do something amazingly unusual so I can have something to say. No? Nuts. I hate using old stuff, it's like eating the leftovers no one wants.

  6. maddy - I don't get the scary searches, only the desperate "indestructible toilet" of "stomach flu" ones....

    maria - yes, the menfolk do appear to be calendar-challenged

    mary alice - I do wish my guidance counselor had been that straight-forward with me, rather than giving me all that "What Color is Your Parachute?" crap.

    sherrytex - Careful what you wish for, honey.

  7. I'm cracking up that your tag cloud includes words like "vomit". Sounds like a mom to me!

  8. LOL on your dad counting on you to remind him of the 51st anniversary! What did he do before you were old enough to do so, lol?

    Amy Dacyczyn is my hero still. I sometimes lapse out of my frugality (particularly at Christmas), but stuff she put in her books helped us out tremendously, too. She ROCKS. I only wish she had a Blog or website going! I check from time to time, but no luck.

    I noticed on your profile you liked the book "The Egg and I"...I LOVED that book (and the Ma & Pa Kettle TV show that was a spin off of that book. My husband and I spent our Honeymoon and our 10 year anniversary in the Cottage where she wrote that book!

  9. I come over here and laugh every day. Thank you.

  10. Cograts on your tag cloud. I don't have one so yours is obviously bigger, but I love how yours has potty and vomit. As far as googling and your Maryland visitor - I have gotten the most traffic from the post I titled "I like big buts" that was about Infomercials. Surely, I was a disappointment too.

  11. A tornado costume...? Really? that just brings up all sorts of questions.

  12. LOVE the tag cloud and all the key words in it... very funny.

    I am too scared to check out my google searches...

  13. Is she a neighbor or a personal trainer? I could use one of those! God bless.

  14. You are always witty and wonderful SC. Don't be coy ;>

  15. Nothing funny happened? Make crap up. That's what I do.

    That was funny, however, that your father forgot his anniversary and blamed you ... I didn't know I could blame my child when I forget an anniversary. I'll have to remember that.

  16. ok, where are you finding out who is searching what on your sitemeter thing? Am I not clicking on the rught buttons when I go looking for it on my sitemeter? AARRGG I used to smart, and could figure stuff out, but with each child that I give birth to I get more and more stupid. Can you believe when Lana got her head stuck in the rocking chair, I honestly thought about trying to figure out how to get her in the van and carseat instead of calling 911. Because I felt stupid to have to call 911 for that. Yeah like going to the ER would make me feel any better. I dont know where my brain is, I swear.

    On your profile it says that you are a homemaker, and that your industry is non-profit. Is that because when you have kids you seem to never end up with a profit? (thats the way it seems at my house)